SpiritED Away
by damaddok
Summary: Hayao Miyazaki's Spirited Away. In this version, Chihiro is related to Edd. See what happens when the Eds go with Chihiro to the bathhouse of the Spirits
1. Chapter 1

This is my first attempt at a fiction. Of Course, Ed, Edd n' Eddy, and everything "Spirited Away does not belong to me. The idea may not even be original. Anyway, enjoy.

SpiritED Away

Chapter 1: Other side of the ED

"I'll miss you Chihiro, you best friend, Lily" said 10 year old Chihiro Ogino. She was an averages sized girl, wearing a white shirt with a large green stripe across the shirt, with pink shorts, and yellow shoes. She was lying in the back seat of an old, blue Honda along with three boys, one a tall, monobrowed, no-chinned boy wearing a green jacket, striped shirt, along with blue jeans and black shoes. He had a blank look in his eyes, helped by the fact he was staring at a spot on the sunroof, drooling out of the side of his mouth. His name was, Ed. Next to him, was Edd, wearing a red t-shirt, blue pants, and black shoes, and was also wearing what looked like an oversized sock on his head. And crammed into the corner was Eddy, the shortest of the three boys wearing a yellow shirt with a red stripe going down his right side, with blue jeans, and red shoes. His most notable feature was that he only had three hairs. Anyway, the three boys were there only since Edd had relatives in Japan, his uncle being Chihiro's father, Akio. Akio had run into some hard times, and he and the rest of the family had to move to the more rural parts of Japan to make ends meet. Edd's parents had come to financially support Akio and his wife Yuuko until they could get back on their feet. When hearing that Edd was leaving for Japan, Eddy and Ed stubbornly refused to let him go unless they came with him. For Eddy, it was because he knew his scams would never fly without Double D's technical know how, and Ed because he wanted to meet Godzilla. Anyway, there they were, Chihiro slumped in her seat being a complete sad-sack.

"Chin up Chihiro, everything will be all right." quipped Double-D

"Yeah honey; look over there, it's your new school" said Akio

"And it's going to stink." Chihiro said under her breath.

The car stopped on a dirt path next to a collection of little stone houses.

"Oh darn, I must have missed the turn-off" groaned Akio

"Uh, Mr. Ogino isn't that your new house over there?" asked Eddy, crammed to one side.

"Oh yes honey look, the blue one at the end." Said Yuuko, pointing up a hill.

"Huh, oh you're right, hang on; I'm taking a short cut."

"Hold on now, every time you do that, you get us lost."

"Relax."

"What are those little houses for anyway." asked Chihiro

"Why Chihiro, those would be the homes for the spirits, or at least, according to Shinto religion, in which the little e spirits use them as homes and…" Double D said and began to drone on.

"You had to get him started" groaned Eddy, cramped as ever. Then, Ed seemed to snap back into reality, at the mention of spirits.

"Ooooh, Double D you mean like the ghosts from 'Vengeance of the Dead' issue #7 limited edition where the ghosts would hide in the birdhouses and wait for their victims to come by so they could-"

VRUMP!

The car suddenly began to shudder as it trudged down the not so well worn path.

Eventually it came to a statue that stood directly in the middle, and then Akio stomped on the brakes, stopping the car directly in front of the statue and sending the three Eds crashing into the seats. Behind the little guardian statue, was what looked like an old gatehouse. As if fixated by some unseen spell, everyone stripped out of the car, and walked to the tunnel.

"It feels like the wind is pulling us in." Said Chihiro to no one.

"Well come on, I wanna see what's on the other side." Said Akio

"I must say this does look like quite an archeological treasure trove", mused Edd

"It's so spooky, and windy and cool!" said Ed, barely containing his excitement

"What about the movers honey?" asked Yuuko, not too enthusiastic about exploring.

"Edd's parents should already be there, and they have keys too." Replied Akio, already entering the tunnel.

"Hey, wait for me!" whined Chihiro.

The group went through, and they found massive grassland on the other side with what looked like an abandoned amusement park only walking distance away. Akio stopped suddenly, and began sniffing the air. "What smells good?"

"Food, out here in the middle of an abandoned town?" pondered Double D.

But it was unheard as Chihiro and the other boys were trying to catch up to the surprisingly Chihiro's surprisingly fast parents. The strong winds that suddenly blew seemed to really help. Once the reached the park they noticed that it was nothing but restaurants. The kids finally found Chihiro's parents by one of the stalls that had a long buffet line of exotic moods. The first thing they noticed was that even with all the food out, there wasn't a soul running the stall or any of the others. "This gives me the creeps." Said Eddy, "it's like a ghost town out here"

Chihiro's parents didn't seem to mind. They were piling food on plates and scarfing it all down like pigs. The kids warned them that it wasn't right, but Akio simply said that he had credit cards and money so there was nothing to worry about. Since there was no stopping them the boys wandered off to the bridge. "Hey Chihi-whatever your name is", yelled Ed, "what is this thingie?" He was pointing to the large tower-like structure at the end of the bridge.

"It's Chihiro, and that's a bathhouse… and it has smoke coming from it. That's strange, if there's no one here, then who's keeping the fires going?"

Edd tried to think of a reason when a train suddenly raced underneath towards the bathhouse. "I didn't know there were any lines out here." Said Edd.

"You shouldn't be here." Said a voice suddenly

The group turned to see a boy not much older than Chihiro, wearing a traditional bathhouse outfit.

"Who's the kid in the pajamas?" asked Eddy

"Ah, a local," began Edd, "could you be so kind as to-

"Leave. NOW! Before it gets dark!" The boy was running to them now, pushing them off the bridge. As he spoke, the sun began to set and the lamps around the bathhouse suddenly lit by themselves.

"Just go, I'll try to distract them" said the oddly dressed boy, and the kids received the message, except Ed, who was to busy picking his nose with his tongue. But when he saw the other three run, he followed closely.

"What was up with that guy?" asked Eddy, quite frustrated. The group had slowed to a walk, not noticing all the other lamps lighting around them. Suddenly, shadows began to appear ion the ground, and rose up, taking form, developing to glowing lights which might have been eyes. Ed watched in amazement while the others were frightened out of their wits. Chihiro was the first to break out of it and run, followed after by Edd, and then Eddy dragging Ed behind him. Chihiro ran to her parents "Come on we have to go!" she yelled, but they didn't seem to listen. They still had their faces plunged into the enormous bowls of food.

"Please, at least show some control Mr. and Mrs. Ogino." Yelled Edd.

"Yeah, if you bothered to get your faces out of the-whoa…" Eddy was shocked by what he saw next.

There were pigs wearing the Oginos' clothes! Ed gasped "Oh no! Pigs have eaten Chihi-whatever her name is' parents!"

"That or they turned into pigs, both are very improbable!" exclaimed Double-D

"We can think about that later sock head, just RUN!" screamed Eddy, and the group ran out to the valley, only there wasn't a valley anymore, just a huge river and what looked like a city far-off.

"It's not too bad, we'll just swim across."

"Uh, Eddy, That may not be such a good idea. I think I saw something big in that water."

"ED NEEDS HIS HAPPY PLACE"

"I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming! Come on wake up! Wake Up! It's just a dream!" yelled Chihiro, assuming fetal position, waiting to wake up.

"I don't think so kid. And stop hitting your head. Do you want to be stupid like lumpy over here?" asked Eddy, pointing to Ed.

"Hey, Eddy, I can see through you. Hey cool I can touch through me too." Said Ed stupidly, as he started poking his hand through his transparent body. Then everyone realized that they were disappearing. Except for Ed, who was having to much fun, thinking he was Ghost Boy. At that same time a ferry boat pulled ashore next to them, unloading it's passengers, who looked a lot like the Shinto spirits Edd was babbling about in the car only a few hours ago. Not sure how the ghosts would react to them, the kids ran. They didn't care where, just not here.

That's Chapter 1. A bit longer than I thought it would turn out. Anyways, enjoy, and please no flames. I don't like those.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Ghosts, Spirits, and ED's Oh my!

Haku came running down from the bathhouse. They probably didn't make it off in time he figured, and they're probably scared and confused. He ran down towards the newly formed lake and followed the trail of Ed's odor. And soon he found the boys huddled with Chihiro who was crying in the corner behind one of the stalls. The Eds were the first to notice Haku.

"What do you want kid?" asked Eddy, trying to mask his fear, but not doing very well at it. Haku reached into his pocket and pulled out a few berries

"Here. You have to eat some food from this world or you will disappear."

"NO!" screamed Chihiro"Don't worry, it's not going to turn you into a pig."

The Eds, knowing how Haku had helped them before, each took a berry and swallowed them whole. Chihiro then ate one as well. "Now come with me." said Haku, holding his hand out for Chihiro. She grabbed his and Haku motioned for the Ed's to grab on. And then, they we're off. Haku ran off with the other 4 in tow.

"WHAAAA! "

"WIND...DRYING...CORNEAS!"

"I'M WINDY SOMEWHERE ELSE GUYS!"

Haku sped through the streets, stalls, and gardens until he finally stopped at a gate right next to the bridge leading to the bathhouse. There, Haku ducked behind some bushes. "Okay, now all 4 of you need to hold your breaths.

"What? Why?" asked Chihiro .

"Because right now there is a spell on you that makes you invisible to everyone , but if you breath then they will see you.

"Well that's a stupid kind of spell."

"Too bad, so sad shorty. Live with it."

Eddy grumbled as he inhaled a huge gulp of air. Everyone else did the same and followed Haku across the bridge. While crossing though, they passed a spirit with only a mask for a face, which seemed to see them even through the spell. Before they could look back however, a frog wearing the same outfit as Haku jumped in front of them. "Master Haku, welcome back!" It yelled.

Chihiro and Ed gasped "Talking Frog! I must touch it!"

That did it. The frog suddenly saw 4 humans appear to the side of Haku. "Humans!", it yelled as it tried to jump up for a closer look, only to have Haku freeze him in mid-air. "Let's go!" Haku exclaimed as he sped past everyone into a small door to the bathhouse gardens. Just as the door closed shut behind them, the frog fell from his stasis spell and noticed that he along with the humans were gone.


	3. Chapter 3

Third chapter is done. It turned out to be bigger than I thought. Ah well, in this one the Eds meet Kamaji, and learn a bit about the bathhouse. Enjoy!

Chapter 3: Will work for ED

The lower areas of the bathhouse were in total chaos. Everyone that wasn't busy with a customer was frantically searching for Haku. Little did they know was that he was hiding near the staircase to the boiler room with 4 humans that shouldn't be there. "Wait to go lumpy!" Eddy said coldly "because of you, those weirdoes almost saw us. Then we might have joined Chihiro's parents in the pig-pen." Eddy realized he shouldn't have said that last part just as he said it. "Er sorry about that kid."

"Never mind that now" said Haku, still scanning if the coast was clear, "you'll have to go alone from here"

"Wait, no!, don't go." begged Chihiro.

"You don't have a choice, if you want your parents to return to normal, then you'll have to trust me and do exactly what I tell you to do. Once things have quieted down, go out through the back gate, and go all the way down the stairs to the boiler room, go inside, and there you will meet Kamaji, the boiler man." As he said this, he used some kind of spell so that Chihiro and the Eds saw where he was talking about through their mind's eye.

"Kamaji?" asked Edd

Haku nodded. "Tell him you want jobs here. Even if he refuses, don't let up. You must work here. If you don't, Yubaba will turn you into an animal."

"What's a Yubibop?" asked Ed, who was barely paying attention

"Yubaba, she's the witch that rules this bathhouse." Answered Haku "Anyway, Kamaji will probably not want to give any of you work, and will try to turn you away, but you must insist on working here. If you do work here, then Yubaba can do nothing to harm you. Do you understand?" Everyone nodded. "Good, I have to go know. Good luck Chihiro."

"How did you know my name?"

"I've known you for a long time. Good luck, and try not to make a sound."

With that Haku went inside to calm everybody down. Chihiro and the Eds stayed in their spot and waited until they were certain things had returned to normal. Eddy was the first to strike out, opening the back door and walking down the stairs, followed by Double-D, Ed, and finally Chihiro "wait up guys" she called.

"It's alright kid, it's not like were heading off anywhere in a hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyy!" The slippery steps coupled with the strong winds sent Eddy Running down the stairs, trying to keep his balance. The others seemed to experience the same problem, running down the stairs, screaming in fright, except for Ed who was sliding down on his but laughing all the way. The run finally hit the wall. Literally, as Eddy slammed face first, followed by Double-D, Ed and Chihiro. "Sandwich" called out Ed just as Eddy squeezed out and clamped a hand over his mouth "Shut it lowbrow, you want to give us away or something?!"

Just as he spoke, a frog-man poked his head out of a window directly above them. At first they though they were caught, until they saw he was smoking something. From there, the four cautiously made their way down the rest of the steps, until they reached the boiler room door. Eddy slapped Ed upside his head and said "Big guy. Sentry duty." Ed pulled a salute and opened the door scanning the room like a parody of 007. "All clear H.Q." said Ed, pulling another salute, which was more of an 'L'. They progressed down the hall, they came to a large room with a large dirt floor in the middle, its wall lined with drawers, an enormous boiler on the side, with what looked like little balls of soot with eyes throwing coal into the furnace. But what caught everyone's attention was the man sitting in the middle of it all. He looked like an ordinary old man, bushy moustache, bald head, black suit, but then there was the fact that he had six arms, each had only 3 fingers. Each hand was constantly working on a certain task, reaching for various dried herbs, crushing them into powder, pushing them into a hole that led to a collection of water, pulling on strings with colored sticks attached to them, and working an enormous wheel.

"Arachno-man!" yelled Ed in excitement, causing the man to look in their direction. After realizing how many new visitors there were, he returned to his work without a work. Suddenly he pulled out a mallet and pounded it on the counter next to him, and suddenly all the soot balls pulled their coals back into various mouse holes, followed closely by any remaining soot balls. Edd was the first this time to brave out into the room. "Excuse me sir me and my companions have come seeking employment, if that is alright." No reply. The others filed into the room, staring at the man as they stood behind Double-D.

"Excuse me, you are Kamaji right?"

That seemed to get the man's attention. He stopped his work and stooped down to get a closer look at Double-D, who was visibly shivering. Chihiro then piped up "Haku told me to ask for a job from you, so can we please have some?"

Just as it looked like he would reply, a little bell ringed and four colored sticks attached to strings came through a hole in the roof. The man turned to it and then his faced turned to shock. "Wha?! Four bath tokens at once?! Come one ya lazy little runts, get back to work." He started banging his mallet on the big metal wheel he normally turned. "To answer that other weak looking kid, yeah, I'm Kamaji, slave to the boiler that heats the baths. Move it ya stupid balls, do ya wanna turn back into soot?!"

Just as he finished, numerous little soot balls emerged from the mouse hole, each carrying a lump of coal and carrying it to the furnace. Everyone tried to step out of the way.

"Hey, OLD GUY! Didn't you hear her, we want to work!"

"Watch your mouth shorty. Besides, I don't need anymore help. With all the soot around here, all I have to do is cast a spell on it and I get all the workers I need." Yelled Kamaji, pointing to the inattentive soot balls. Suddenly it looked like he was reaching a hand for Chihiro. "Out of the way." He then opened a drawer behind her, pulling out a lump of dried plants, then counting the number of drawers upwards then to the left, he opened another drawer and pulled out a few more strands, and then he put it all in his bowl, grinding it up, and then pulling on two strands of string with the colored sticks, and they shot up. Edd was thinking of another form of argument while Ed was watching the little soot balls run about. One came out of a hole, carrying a very heavy looking lump of coal, and it suddenly collapsed. The other soot balls didn't seem to care, and they worked their way around it. Ed looked with horror at the soot ball's plight. He then lifted the coal. "Fear not little ball of ash and eyeballs, as I shall carry on your duty. You shall not have been crushed in vain." But then he noticed that the pile of soot reassembled itself into a ball, which flew back into the hole. Ed then ran over to the furnace and threw the coal into the furnace. Edd clapped, "Well done Ed.", Eddy looked on. "I think you found your calling lumpy." And even Chihiro was lightened a little by Ed's simplicity. However, Kamaji didn't look very happy. It became apparent quickly, when the soot balls started pretending their coals were to heavy for them and piling around Ed. "See? The soot balls now want you to do their job. You do their work, they start to get lazy, and then the spell wears off and turns back into soot! There's nothing here for humans, so try somewhere else!" At the sound of that, the soot ball got out from under their coal pieces and started squeaking angrily at Kamaji.

"And what's wrong with all of you?" he yelled, pointing his mallet at the soot balls. " Do you _want_ to turn back into soot!? Get back to work!"

Suddenly a wooden screen swung open revealing what looked like a woman. The Eds and Chihiro went behind Kamaji to hide, not sure of what this new person would do. She called out "Feeding Time!" Kamaji nodded, and then called out to the soot balls "Meal Time! Take a break!"

With that the little balls of soot left their coal in a pile surrounding Ed and ran of to the woman, who proceeded to throw rock candies to them like corn to a chicken. Then she looked to the side and noticed the 4 kids. "Humans!" she gasped, pointing at them. "You're the ones everyone is looking for!"

"They're my grandchildren" said Kamaji between mouthfuls of food.

"What?" said the woman.

"They came by to ask for work. I've already got all the help I need. Could you take her to see Yubaba? They may not look it, but they're strong and able, I think they can handle it."

"No way. I'm not about to risk my life for them."

"Well then, what if I gave you this roasted newt? It's good one." Kamaji reached into a drawer and pulled out a charred lizard looking length of meat. Ed watched with interest, Chihiro with curiosity, and Edd and Eddy with revulsion.

"Listen here kids, if you want jobs, then you'll have to make a deal with Yubaba, she's the head honcho here."

The woman snatched the newt reluctantly from Kamaji and looked that the kids saying "Well come on. And leave your shoes, you won't need them." The four proceeded to take them off, but the moment Ed popped one of his shoes off, an unearthly stench of biblical proportions filled the room, making most of the soot balls faint. "Er, actually (choke) the tall (wheeze) one should keep his on. (My eyes.)"

The four followed the woman to the door she came from. "What's wrong with all of you. Kamaji is really risking a lot to do this for you.

"Oh, Pardon us. Ahem, many thank dear Kamaji of the Boilers for your contributions." Said Edd

"Yes, thank you sir" said Chihiro

Kamaji looked at them and gave them thumbs up. "Good luck kids. And I mean it."

As the door closed behind the kids, Kamaji said to himself "You will need it."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: 4th Floor: Underwear, Underwear, and ED

The Eds made their way through what looked like the operating room for the bathhouse. "We'll have to go all the way to the top. That's where Yubaba lives." They all piled into an elevator and went up as far as it would get them. Which was the kitchen. "We'll have to switch, come with me." Said the woman. She took a long route around, so that they wouldn't be noticed. Ed was attracted to the scents of various foods, but Eddy pulled him back. "Whoa there big guy. You might be on the menu if they see you."

Finding another elevator, the group piled in again. Chihiro took and interest in looking outside to see how high up they were. They were pretty high. The elevator stopped, and the doors opened to reveal, a large, white spirit with a large saucer on its head, with roots for a mouth, and stalks for hands. "The Radish Spirit! Hi!"

The spirit started making noises in its own language but the woman somehow understood it. "I'm sorry. This elevator doesn't go any higher. You'll have to find another one." The woman then motioned for the kids to stay close to her. They found out why when they stepped out. They were right in the middle of the baths. The place may have been crowded, but not too much to where they would be ignored by the wary. They hurried behind the woman, with the Radish Spirit following not too far away, making a squeaky noise every time his feet touched the wood. He saw the human kids, but apparently he didn't seem to care. "Just don't look at him. That would be rude." warned the woman. Finding an elevator that actually went higher, the woman pressed the call button. The door opened to reveal a few more strange looking spirits followed by a guide "Come right this way sirs your rooms are down this way." The woman then pushed all 4 kids in the elevator just as the Radish Spirit went in, blocking them from view by the spirit's immense body. The guide stopped and turned to the woman. "Hey, Lin, I smell human. And it seems to be coming from you. Okay, what are you hiding?" Lin pulled out her roasted newt.

"Is this what you smell?"

"Ro…Roa…Roasted newt?! Gimme!"

"Ah… no. I'm keeping this one to myself." She turned to the Spirit "If you want to go up, pull the lever down. The Spirit nodded, knowing the kids behind him head it. However, his hands didn't have much of any grip, so Eddy reached past him and pulled the lever down. Just as the door closed, Lin put the whole roasted newt in her mouth, denying the desperate guide even a taste of the treat.

The elevator was very cramped. Try to pack 4 kids and a huge spirit into a compartment probably meant only for 1 spirit and 1 kid. "I feel like I'm in a can of sardines." Groaned Eddy, his face pressed against the wall the spirit's butt cheeks.

"Well, we're almost there Mr. Eddy." Chihiro said.

"I wish I was a Radish Spirit guys." Ed said. The Radish spirit said something in his language again.

"I wish I understood that" said Edd.

"Oh, he told me to watch out for what I wish for. Yubapopowab or whatever her name is might make it come true." Said Ed. Everyone stared at him.

"You know Radish Lumpy? Geez, I expected that from Rolf."

"I have a vegetable brain Eddy."

The door opened to reveal a room that looked absolutely lifeless except for the shadows moving about behind the screens. What was happening can be left to the imagination, but none of them, Eds, Chihiro, or Spirit got off, and the door closed, progressing upward. The elevator stopped again. "Is this our stop?" Chihiro wondered

"The Spirit said yes. And be careful with what you say, or Yubaba will do bad things to you."

"Well thank-

"Horrible things."

"Thank-

"Horrible icky things"

"…"

"I'm done now Double-D."

"Thank you Mr. Spirit."

"Yeah see ya later."

The spirit nodded and the doors closed again, leaving the group of humans in the dark hallway. "Well you heard him Eddy. Try to keep your manners with Yubaba. Try not to lose it." Said Double-D


	5. Chapter 5

The name says it all. Yeas, I finally updated this. With hope the next will follow relatively quickly.

Chapter 5: Eddy Loses it

The Eds approached the door. As Edd touched the door handle, the knocker came alive. "Aren't you even going to knock? Even a pitiful rabble like you should have some etiquette." There was a click and doors suddenly swung open, as did the others behind it.

"Well? Come in." came a voice from nowhere. Everyone was a bit hesitant. "I said, come in."

As the voice finished, they all felt a force tugging on their shirts. The force continued to amplify pulling everyone in, or it would have except Ed stood their like and anchor, everyone hanging off of him as the force continued to. "The hall wants to eat us!"

"It's the walls of Damocles! EVIL! RUN AWAY!"

"NOT COOL! NOT COOL!"

The voice then came back. "Let go you idiots. Nothing's going to hurt you. Yet."

"Okey-dokey" yelled Ed to no one ad he stopped resisting. The group was suddenly pulled through the hall and then made a sharp turn down a much narrower hallway. "Wait I have to go to the bathroom." Blurted Ed.

"What!?" came the voice. "Okay fine." Everyone still hung in mid-air while Ed was pulled back though the hall and was sent through a door. A short while, a bad stink, and a series of flushes later, Ed was dragged back by the invisible force. "Ugh, I'm never using that toilet again." Said the voice. The four continued down the hallway to a lavish living room where the spell seemed to wear off and hurled them in, sending the kids tumbling on top of each other. "Sandwich x2!" yelled Ed.

As soon as the room stopped spinning, the first thing they saw was three green human heads, bouncing and rolling around them going "booy!"

Ed loved what he saw, while a repulsed Edd tried to clamber away, whimpering in fear.

"Quiet, you're making such a racket" came the same voice, but this time, it didn't have the same, hollow disemboweled sound as it did in the halls. At the end of the room, was a desk piled with paperwork, and gold coins. Behind that sat a woman with an oversized head, and an even more over-sized nose. She was dressed in a traditional Victorian style dress, and on her fingers were many rings with oversized gems. This was most likely Yubaba. Chihiro stood up. "Excuse me ma'am. We're looking for jobs, so can we have some?"

Edd stood next to her "Yes, Ms. Yubaba, would it be possible to give us some form of employment? We have, after all, come a long way."

Yubaba looked up from her paperwork and made a line motion in the air. Then Edd's and Chihiro's mouths zipped shut. "Don't give me that load of crock. You're just a bunch of lazy stinking humans. There's nothing for you in a spirits' bathhouse."

Eddy kept his mouth in a smile but he looked ready to burst. "Well I'm exaggerating the truth. You can be piglets. Or would you prefer lumps of coal? It all depends on if you want to be eaten after being burnt to a crisp." At this point, Eddy started twitching. Yubaba took a cigarette and a cigarette smoker out of a drawer, and "summoned" a light and lit the cigarette. She took a long draw and blew billows of smoke out of her gargantuan nostrils. She started cackling "Well on the other hand, you made it this far, but even so you weak little monkeys had to have help. Why don't you tell me who they were so we can 'thank' them?"

She then 'unzipped' Edd's and Chihiro's mouths.

That tore it. Monkey might have been a compliment for Ed, but to say that his best job here would be a pig, and then change the subject like there's no argument! "Hey you old hag! Stop acting like we're babies! You have got a lot of nerve dragging us all the way out here just to throw us out and laugh at us! Now are you going to give us jobs or ain't ya!?"

"Shut it!"

"No I won't! You can't tell us what to do! I'll get myself a job here if it kills Ed!" With that, he grabbed one of the green heads and threw it at her, knocking down books and papers before flying out the window.

"Oh my... Eddy, that might have been a bad idea..."

Edd was right. Yubaba looked ready to explode. The entire room began to shake and suddenly explode everywhere, flying around like some bad Exorcist movie. Yubaba was also in the air. But she was flying towards the group, landing only an inch away from Eddy. "Why should I, or anyone in their right minds, give any of you jobs!? Anyone can see that you're all just a bunch of spoiled, rotten, lazy brats, and I've got all bums I need. On the other hand, I could work you to the bone. Pushing you until you breath your last breathe." As she said this, she walked behind them, keeping her hands on Eddy and Chihiro, keeping a finger on each of their throats. If Yubaba was going to do anything else, she was cut off by a loud thump. Everyone turned to the direction of the noise, a door near Yubaba's desk. There was another thump and the door broke down, revealing an over-sized baby foot. Following the thump, there was the sound of a baby throwing a tantrum. Yubaba's initial anger subsided to concern. "Oh dear you woke up the baby! Come here my little woogie... What are you four still doing here? Leave!"

"Okey dokey Yubabiwokey."

"No. We're not moving until you give us employment."

"Not that again." The baby's foot came out again and kicked Yubaba in the face. This time Chihiro stepped up. "We're not leaving until you give us jobs!" she screamed.

"Alright fine! Hold on Boh, Mommy's coming." Then silence. Then 4 sheets of paper flew up and landed in the groups' hands. "Just sign your contracts, and I'll put you to work."

She emerged from the ruined door, pulling out flecks and bits of wood from her hair, all while flicking her hand about, directing her magic to clean the ruined living room. "I can't believe I took that oath, to give a job to whoever asks."

As soon as all four finished signing their names, Yubaba drew the papers to her. "Alright. Ahem. Which one of you is ED?"

"Present and accounted for Yubiwobiwo buh boo ppppp."

"Ugh. Ooookay. Edd?"

"That would be me Ms. Yubaba."

"I'll just assume that that small and annoying is Eddy."

"I'll give you annoying (censored for your discretion)"

"Watch your tongue there, do you want to be turned to coal? And you little dearie, you must be Chihiro. Am I right?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Well, what a pretty little name. Too bad it belongs to me now." Yubaba waved her hand over Chihiro's name and the letters flew upward, into her grasp. All that was leftwas one of the characters. Sen. "From now on you're new name is Sen, am I clear?"

"Er, uh, yes ma'am."

"Good, anyways Haku should be here anytime to direct you to the living quarters. Which should be right about…" The doors flew open. "Now."

"You called for me?" asked Haku.

"Yes, bring them down to the dormitories and give them a place to sleep. We'll figure out what they're good at in the morning. And that's when the fun begins." Yubaba chuckled.

"Yes mistress."

Haku herded everyone out leaving Yubaba to herself. "The girl seems alright, but somehow I get the feeling those other three clowns will probably ruin me. Ah well."

What will happen to everyone? Will Chihiro return her parents to normal? Will the Eds really ruin Yubaba with their wacky, and at times, disturbing antics? Will Edd have a weird dream where everyone becomes ballet dancers? The answers will becoming…not now.


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry for the long update time, but my old drive died, and my network has been blipping on and off lately. But here's the next chapter. Guess where I borrowed the dream sequence from.**

Chapter 6: Not You're Usual ED

The dorms were in a ruckus, the news that Haku was bringing down for humans to the dorm spread like wildfire. When checking them in, the manager stuck up his nose. "I don't care what Yubaba does to you, but I don't want these humans in our dorms."

"That's alright, Yubaba personally hired them herself." Returned Haku, face as hard and indifferent as ever.

"What?! Well, uh, we still don't want them here. They'll, uh, stink up the place with their stench."

"Sorry." Said Ed

"Sorry for what lunk- oh! I was right next to him and everything!" gagged Eddy. Half the people crowd in the room nearly fainted from the smell, others gripped their noses and stuffed them down their shirts, even Haku, who looked unmoved was tearing up.

"A few days eating our food and the smell will go away. These humans will work their hardest here, and if Yubaba doesn't like their progress, then you can do whatever you want with them. Lin, you can take Chihiro. Ed boys, you follow the manager to your quarters." With that, Haku ran off before anyone could protest.

"Isn't he lucky? I think my nose melted."

It is nearing dawn. On the roof of the bathhouse, Yubaba was with Haku and the three green heads. "Be sure to turn off the lights when you leave Haku, and make sue that Eddy character doesn't come up here to pilfer any of the money."

"As you wish mistress."

With that, he and the heads bowed while Yubaba threw a cloak around her and left for the patio. There she hopped onto the rail, and here cloak grew wings, making here look like a giant, ugly bird with a bad hairdo. Then she flew off with a near identical and much smaller bird that looked like her. Haku watched her leave and then turned off the lights and locked the door.

"Eddy. Eddy wake up." Said Ed. Eddy woke up to find himself inside what looked like a Japanese bedroom. "Whu? Where am I? Wait, I'm in that bathhouse aren't I? Trapped by that ghost witch?"

"What? No of course not silly, you are merely staying in my guest room while you're house is being fumigated." Said Ed calmly. "Now come, let me treat you to some Belgian Jawbreakers."

"I love you Ed, and I want to have your baby." And with that, Eddy jumped up and embraced Ed. "Hang on one second Ed, my sister is here." As he pointed to what looked like his brother in a dress. "Hey Ed, where's Double- hey who gave you permission to turn into a wolf? Oh wait I get it, this is a dream this is a stinking dream." muttered Eddy as he crawled back into bed ad everyone else danced ballerina style out of the room.

"Eddy. Eddy wake up." Said Ed. Eddy woke up to find himself inside what looked like a Japanese bedroom. "Whu? Where am I? Wait, I'm in that bathhouse aren't I? Trapped by that ghost witch?"

"What? No of course not silly."

"Then where am, stop everything, if we keep this up you're going to turn into a wolf again."

"Really? Wow cool." By this point, Eddy was already up, trying to maneuver his way past the sleeping bodies towards the porch, where Double-D was waiting for him.

"So Sockhead, what's going on?" Eddy asked, stretching.

"I saw that Haku character take Chihiro somewhere. And I don't know about you, but I'm getting a feeling it won't end well."

"And this involves me getting up how?" said Eddy, face smothered in his arms over the railing.

"Because she's family! Or, actually just my family, but still!"

"Okay fine! Hey Ed! I'm over here!" shouted Eddy to Ed, who was trying to solve how to get out of Eddy's bed sheet. Eddy sighted and snatched the sheet off of Ed's head. "I am cured of my plight! Thank you Eddy!"

The three Eds snuck past the dorms and down to the boiler room. Kamaji was snoring, absolutely unaffected by the Eds stumbling into the room. They entered just in time to see Chihiro close the exit. "After her." Said Edd breathlessly and they stormed across the dirt, smashing several soot balls in the process.

They followed her to the bridge where Chihiro met Haku again. "I see you decided to bring your friends along." Haku remarked. Chihiro looked behind her to see the Eds panting behind her "Huh? No I didn't know. But still, let them come."

"Very well."

"I hate the way he says that 'very well' all haughty like." Groaned Eddy once he was sure Haku was out of earshot.

Haku gripped Chihiro who was in turn gripped by Edd, and rushed along through the streets and off into a farm, out of the way of the bathhouse and everything else. Ed grabbed Eddy by the leg and was able to keep up the pace with surprising ease. Haku stopped by a pig pen. But Ed's brain took some time to register with his legs that they should stop. Chihiro looked at the pen with a puzzled look. "Is that where my parents are?"

Haku nodded. Chihiro ran into the pen and screamed for her parents but to no avail. None of the pigs even turned to her. "Which ones are my parents?"

"Those two." remarked Ed, as he pointed to two pigs near the back.

"Once again Ed, you display intelligence I only expect form Rolf."

"I can touch my toes Double-D."

"Say, when did you get here anyway?" asked Chihiro.

"Uh…let me get back to you on that."

**There you go. Oh, and in case if you couldn't find out, the dream was a spin ff of a sketch in Black Adder the Third. That guy is funny. Anyway, I'm starting to work on the next chaptr, and I pray that I can get it done faster than this one.**


	7. Chapter 7

**I know this is kinda short, but I was also thinking of a third story, involving the Eds, and another one of Miyazaki's movies "The Cat Returns" I'm still thinking it through whether or not I should. If I do, than less time to my current stories. If I don't, I'll probably forget the entire idea. Anyway, enjoy.**

Chapter 7: Back to the Old ED

By the time Chihiro and the Eds returned to the bathhouse, everyone was already up and preparing for work. Chihiro was sent to scrub the floors while Lin washed the walls. Edd and Ed were placed in the kitchen to inspect all the dishes, but were kicked out shortly after Ed consumed all the meat, leaving the cooks to try and reach quota again in a very small amount of time. Eddy was thrown about all over the place, mainly because he was either trying to pickpocket one of the employees or because he was loafing about. When it became apparent that Chihiro and Co. performed poorly at just about…everything, the manager huddled them together and bought Lin over. With a hint of satisfaction he said they all had tub duty. The 'Big Tub' duty to be specific. And he left before Lin could protest. "Say Lin, what's so bad about the Big Tub?" asked Chihiro.

"Oh yeah, well, it's the tub that's used for washing our really big, really dirty customers. It's got so much grime, it's nigh impossible to wash off. Go empty that bucket outside." Said Lin as she noticed Chihiro still was holding onto the water bucket she cleaned the floors with. As Chihiro scurried to the patio, Lin led the Eds to the actual baths. Everyone eyed them, knowing full about the fate that had befallen them. But they weren't looks of pity, but looks of amusement. "Hey Lin," called one of them, "be extra thorough on the left side, our last customer forgot to wipe."

"Leave us alone will ya'?"

"And spoil the fun?" sneered the frog-like man. Ed, who didn't understand what anyone was saying could still read facial expression and noticed that man should get back to work. Ed made clear his view when he shouted "Back to your post or else…"

"Else what?!" asked the man, smile on his face. Ed whipped out a probably 2 year-old, moldy, evil-smelling sandwich, and retorted "Or else you will face the wrath of Peter!" No one poked fun at them after that. At least those that were still conscious.

……….

Chihiro was on the porch, dumping the water out of her bucket, when she looked up, and saw that the no-faced spirit that seemed to stare at her from before was outside. "Hey, are you okay out there? The rain's coming down pretty badly." No-Face just continued to stare at her. Chihiro started getting a bit uncomfortable. "Here, I'll leave the door open so you can come in later." With that she left.

No-Face took up Chihiro's offer. He disappeared and reappeared at the foot of the porch, and slowly made his way inside.

……….

Yubaba had already returned from wherever she had left, and was already busy looking at all here jewels, making sure they were authentic and valuable. Then she felt something. Something big. Something big and really bad smelling. Her suspicions were confirmed as the lights in the buildings surrounding the bathhouse began to go out. If the local spirits could be spooked, it was probably pretty horrendous.

……….

"No, I can't afford to hand a bath token out to anyone who wants one." Said the foreman indignantly. Chihiro was sent to see the foreman for an herbal soak token, and was currently getting the blunt of the foreman's bias. In another second, another cleaner came by and asked for a mugwort token, which the foreman happily granted. "What are you still doing here?! I thought I told you to get the-hang on, yes?" he was interrupted by a call from Yubaba. While he was talking, No-Face suddenly appeared next to the foreman, switching between Chihiro and the tokens. He disappeared again, and one of the tokens began to hover and floated to Chihiro while the foreman was busy. Chihiro grabbed it and bowed to where she assumed No-Face was standing. She rushed off to give Lin the token, and Lin, promptly filled the tub with steaming hot, scented bathwater. Lin said "Good job Sen, you got really good herb water and everything. You stay with Dumb, Dumber, and Double-D, I'll get some breakfast." And she walked off. Chihiro turned to Edd "So you managed to wash off all the grime?'

"Well the first layer of it, yes. The rest of it was so welded to the tub we figured we'd just hide it under water and GOOD LORD WHEN DID THAT GET HERE?!?!" he screamed as he pointed behind Chihiro. Eddy was equally frightened, but Ed was simply puzzled. "Rolf, is it time to celebrate the spirit of the squash again already?"

"That's not Rolf air-for-brains. That's a real ghost!"

"But Eddy, what about everyone else here. Aren't they also ghosts? Aren't Arachno-man a ghost, and Yububebobebooop also ghosts?"

While Eddy was bickering with Ed, trying to convince him the difference between a ghost and a spirit, and Edd, barely able to control his bowels, Chihiro looked behind her to see No-Face again. This time, his hands were filled with bath tokens. Chihiro looked up at No-Face with a confused look. "Thank you but, I only needed one." If No-Face did have a face, it would be disappointment. He disappeared again and the tokens dropped to the floor. All four stared dumbfounded at the spot No-Face was at only a few seconds ago, bought back to reality when they realized they over-filled the tub.

**Yes. Cut off right at the Stink Spirit portion. But that's already being worked on by the time any of you see this.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Geez, this has been a long time. School, family, everything just seems to intensify as summer gets closer. But I'm definitely going to finish this. I put too much in to stop. Well, I've watched "Return of the Cat" and now I'm trying to figure out how to include the Eds in it, or any other of the characters. So you can expect the first chapter in one of the two next updates.**

Chapter 8: Splish, Splash, I was taking an ED

Yubaba came rushing down the stairs to the front entrance. "So what is it?" she asked the foreman, referring to their soon to be guest.

"A Stink Spirit and it's a big one. Even so, it still smells a little too rotten even at that size."

The massive globe that was the Stink Spirit oozed closer and closer to the bathhouse, ignoring the numerous employees outside trying to turn him…her…it, away. But getting to close to the spirit, the employees caught whiff of a stench only Ed could rival.

……….

Though Yubaba couldn't see what was going on, she was fully aware that something weird was going on. However, until she had some hard evidence she was at a loss. "Well, send him to the Big Tub, and get him out of here as fast as you can. Why don't you bring Ed and Sen to greet him and have the other to humans wait by the tub to help?"

The Foreman sprinted to the Big Tub, and yelled for Chihiro and Ed. "You got a customer; go see Yubaba at the front! Double Time!" Chihiro ran off, barley keeping in pace with a giggling Ed. Edd and Eddy were about to go to, but the foreman cut them off. "You two can wait here, but that doesn't mean you don't have to help." Whatever was coming, it probably wasn't good the Eds thought, considering the entire lower floor was being cleared of personnel and customers alike.

At this time, Yubaba was trying to teach Chihiro about greeting the guest. Chihiro absorbed the information like a sponge, but with Ed, it was in one ear and out the other, assuming it even went in. "Now don't mess this up, just take the payment, wash him up in the Tub and get him out."

"But Ms. Yubaba I-"

"No buts or I'll turn you to coal. Not you Ed. There's not much difference between you and coal anyway."

"Greetings to you too Yubbba-dabba-doo."

Yubaba was close to breaking her cane when a foul stench began to enter the bathhouse. The cloth that acted as the door became dark and rotten as the gelatinous mound of festering muck oozed into the entrance. Everyone tensed up except Ed. "What smells good?" he asked. His question was answered as the Stink Spirit's face emerged under the constantly moving pile of slime. Yubaba, strained her face to its breaking point, trying to smile "Oh look, a valued customer. Welcome to our humble…gasp…humble bathhouse." A long appendage emerged from the slime, and there was a tint of gold before covered by ooze again. "Oh look its money. Ed take the money and Sen, direct him to the Tub."

Ed stuck out his hand and the mud-covered coins fell into his hands with a sickening plop. Sen guided the Spirit to the Big Tub.

"I do worry for Chihiro and Ed. For something to force the entire staff upstairs must be something of a horrendous magnitude." Edd was pacing the floor anxiously, while Eddy watched, just as tense, but outwardly calm.

"Yeah, but I'm sure there's a better way than to pace around like that. Look, you're wearing a hole in the floor."

"I did not."

"That or you shrank a bit."

"What? Hey, what's that smell?"

Just at that moment, he noticed Yubaba upstairs, throwing orders all over the place. "OPEN SOME WINDOWS! GET SOME AIR FRESHNERS! AND SOME NOSE PLUGS! YOU EDS! YOU"RE GONNA DEAL WITH A STINK THING! GET READY!"

"Stink thi- OH! That's what." Edd yelled as a stink filled the entire house. Around the corner came Ed and Chihiro leading a massive shapeless sludge monster. Edd tried to sound as polite as possible without inhaling any of the fumes. "Right this way sir enjoy yourself."

The spirit moved right past him and jumped into the water, splashing mud all over the bath stall. "Edd was a bout ready to vomit, but he swallowed, teary-eyed. "Eddy! How about some assistance here!?" Eddy however had fainted from the smell, and came to when the muck splashed him. His voice was completely muffled but it sounded something like 'I can't see anything…the rest was too muffled by the mud.

The spirit surfaced, just as grimy when it fell into the bath. It slowly turned to Ed and Chihiro making some sounds which bubbled through its mouth. "What did it say Ed?" asked Chihiro.

Ed looked like he was deep in thought. "I think he either said he wanted more bath water or he latest issue of 'Horrors from the Earwax Museum!'.

"Well we don't have the second one so try the water Sen!" grunted Edd as he tried to pull Eddy upright through the mud, only succeeding in falling face-first into the grime. Chihiro nodded and slowly inched towards the token-taker that told Kamaji what kind of bath-water she wanted. She grabbed the basket that contained all the tokens No-Face gave her. Above Yubaba stared at everything happening and she turned to the foreman "Where did she get all those bath-tokens?"

"It wasn't me!" said the foreman defensively.

Just then, the water tube came down through a nearby tube, and Chihiro pulled down on it, but doing so also caused her to fall into the tub with Stink Spirit. The spirit reached out and plucked her out from the muck and guided her to one of his sided. Chihiro felt something sticking out. "Hey guys, there's something sticking out of side! Like a thorn or something!"

Lin came running into the stall with a handkerchief around her face and yanked both Edd and Eddy out of the mud. All this time Yubaba was watching attentively. "A thorn huh? Foreman, get the staff down there. Don't ask why, just do it." Following that, she jumped down and stopped mid air right in front of Chihiro.

"Listen to me Sen, that's no Stink Spirit there." She pulled a rope out of nowhere and tossed one end to Chihiro. "Tie this around that thorn in his side." Chihiro nodded and tied a knot around the 'thorn' with Lin's help.

"I got it!" she yelled. By this point the entire staff, or most of it was down by the stall. They all grabbed onto a part of the rope. Yubaba stood on the wall and produced to fans. "Everyone on my go. And…HEAVE!" And everyone began pulling at the rope. Except Ed, who just stared off into space. Eddy, flustered, smacked Ed upside his head. "HET LUMPY! Why don't you help pull?!"

"Oh, you mean like this Eddy?" and he ran off to the end of the tugging line, grabbed the end of the rope with one hand, and gave a sharp tug. Everyone flew back and the "thorn came right out. The 'thorn was actually a bike…and a cupboard…and a mirror… and a T.V set, and well, a lot of slime covered junk. And half the stall was filled with garbage. Eddy stared at the mess. "Hey Ed, I think that's all the junk in your garage."

"Oh no Eddy, see that T.V is a Toshiba, I have a Zenith."

Chihiro was still trying to pull out a fishing lure. With one final pull, she yanked it out with a loud pop. "Ahhhhhhhhh." Said a disembodied voice, and the stink spirit receded into the water, the excess bathwater flowing around Chihiro.

It would have dragged her away like the Eds, but a watery hand came out and held on to her. Everyone looked quite confused Except for Yubaba. "Thought so."

Eddy tried to pull himself out of the water, but then he saw a glint on the floor. He stooped down to see. It was a small nugget of pure gold. He quickly pocketed it before anyone else noticed, and reached for another. Unfortunately, someone else noticed the gold and yelled so everyone could hear "Look! Gold!" and everyone barreled past Eddy to search for and pick up nuggets. Yubaba glared at the staff and yelled 'Cut that out, our guest is still here!"

Chihiro was held in one place at the mouth of the bath. A head floated out, and said "Well done" in a raspy, but booming voice. The water receded, and Chihiro noticed she had a perfectly round ball of some kind of plant. The water began to rumble and quake. Yubaba yelled "Open the main gates, out of our guests way!"

As the main gate opened the water erupted and formed into a dragon like creature made completely of the bathwater, with the head Chihiro so in front of it all, cackling. The spirit shot straight out of the gate and flew into the sky. As he left, the guests above gave a great cheer, and Yubaba grabbed the Eds and Chihiro, squeezing them. 'You were all so great. We've made so much money off of him!" she sang, "That was no spirit; that was a wealthy and powerful River God. Ha, ha this calls for a toast! Sake's on the house tonight!" a cheer rose from the staff, "…after you return all the gold you found that is." And the cheers were quickly replaced by protests. Behind all the ruckus and noise, No-Face looked at everyone, then Chihiro, and then the hand full of gold he picked up.

**I'm already working on the next chapter. Final Fantasy: the ED connection is really lacking attention I just realized. Something else to add to my list. Sorry. Oh yeah, and for some reason, my computer won't let me upload more chapters, so it'll be even harder to update. I'm lucky that I spent the night at a relative's house to do this.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Yes, summer. Finals are done, and my internet is semi-fixed! So I'll have a lot more time to update stuff. Here are the next two chapters, and also for those of you reading Final Fantasy: The ED Connection, I'll be updating right after this. As soon as I find the files…and …you know…update them…and stuff. **

Chapter 9: Spirits Are Not All Smiles and ED

Everyone had just about returned to their dorms and the sake party was over. Chihiro was sitting on the porch outside hers; staring at the ball of plant she had received. The Eds, she could make no sight of since the party had started, but knowing them, they were probably off conning what they could off the other employees. Then she looked back at the plant the River God had given her. Curious, she nibbled a bit of it off. It turned out to be some kind of cake. A bitter cake. A bitter cake that made her feel like vomiting. A bitter cake at made her feel like vomiting alot. She made a grab for the pork bun next to her and scarfed it down to get rid of the gagging feeling in her throat.

…..

"So you got it now big guy?" Eddy asked Ed.

"What're we doing here again Eddy?" replied Ed, completely oblivious to everything around him.

"Listen up Stupid, this is the last time I'm repeating it. Were down here in the bath floor to see if there's any gold the other workers didn't scrounge up. I ain't letting' that old hag get all the good stuff after that stink thing. I want my pay for still needing to get mud out of my teeth, and you're going to find it for me."

"What's in it for me?" asked Ed, a frown on his face.

"I'll use the moolah we get to buy a mountain of jaw breakers, and then I'll let you have 1 whole jaw-breaker!" Eddy added a very definite tone to make it sound like a privilege. T worked though, as Ed jammed his nose to the ground and began trying to sniff on the run. A few minutes later, he ran back with his cheeks full. "Found some Eddy!" exclaimed Ed happily.

"Ed, I wanted gold…NOT MOLD!"" Eddy growled in frustration. "And keep it down, you never know if here's anyone down he"- he was cut off as he heard a muffled cry and suddenly silence again. "Okay, that was creepy, Ed, we should just walk away, now."

"It came from this way! Tally ho!"yelled Ed as he grabbed Eddy by the arm and raced off to the source of the noise. They stopped at the mouth of the Big Tub stall, or actually Ed did. Eddy slammed into Ed's bulky form. "Ow, lunkhead, what as that all about-oh…that." He saw that Ed was staring at No-Face, except No-Face was a lot bulkier, was perched on the hem of the tub with arms and legs, and the mask on his face was no longer a frown, but smirking. "Hey Doofus, and Goofus, look alive. I'm hungry, starving in fact. Get me some food; I'll even pay up front." He said in a snide tone.

As he said that, a mound of gold nuggets appeared from his hand. Eddy began to drool as he tried to grab as much of the gold as he could, but Ed continued to stare at him. "That voice… OH NO! YOU'VE BECOME EVIL AND DEVORED THE POOR LITTLE FROG GUY WHO CAME DOWN HERE LOOKING FR GOLD NUGGETS TOO AND NO YOU'R"-

"Ed… button your beak and help our valued customer to some food. Remember, the less people awake, the more money for us. Get Edd up. He may know a thing or two about making food."

"And I want a bath, right in this tub too." said No –Face.

"Of course good sir. But I'll need a payment in advance." No-Face tossed him a handful of gold. With that Eddy ran off to open he water tube he saw Chihiro use earlier that night and pulled down to bring a torrent of lukewarm, scented bathwater flowing into the tub. No-Face cannon balled in, and surface a second later to a drenched Eddy, who looked happy despite his twitching eye. "Is there anything else you need sir before I go to the kitchens?"

"Yeah, turn on some light. The place is like crypt." sneered No-Face.

"Of course sir." replied Eddy through his teeth.

…..

Ed walked down the dorms, counting the rooms he past and desperately trying to remember which room Edd was sleeping in. Eventually he gave up and open doors at random, leaving it up to luck. Every time he did, he swung the sliding door off their hinges, breaking them and making a horrible racket. Eventually he found Edd, sleeping soundly surprisingly despite the entire racket, and promptly edged his way over to him. As he stood right over Edd, Ed cracked his knuckles, placed his hands on Edd's head, and arm, then hook with the power of a jack hammer. "WAKE UP SLEEPY-HEAD FOR IT IS TIME TO CON GOLD OFF THE NO FACED GHOST!" that woke p just about everyone in the dorm. "Whuzzis about shome gold?" asked one.

…..

"One of these things should be the microwave." muttered Eddy as he traversed through the maze that was the kitchen.

So far, the only food he had ready for No-Face was some cold rice, and a boiling pot of water with a few chopped vegetables in it. He had no idea what else he could do, except maybe look for some nachos and cheese. Who doesn't like that? "Hey, kid, step aside and let me do the cooking."

Eddy turned to see one of the cooks trot past him and began to heat up several of the ovens. "Whoa! What are you doing down here."

"The same reason everyone else is here Eddy." came Edd's voice from behind. "They all want a share of that gold our companion was screeching about."

"Oh, He Double-D, how's it going?" Eddy tied to sound as innocent as possible.

"Relax Eddy; everyone will be too busy trying to get a tip to be angry at you right now. That is if you tell them everything about our guest."


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: The ED thickened…and curdled and developed that icky soup skin stuff.

"Sen, Hey Sen, wake up."

Chihiro rose from her cot, and tried to blink back the drowsiness from her eyes. Rin was sitting next to her, more excited than she had ever seen her. "Wha? It's still day out, did something bad happen?"

"No, some person came in and started demanding service, even though we were closed. We would have thrown him out, but he's paying up front in gold! He's tossing it about like it was dirt! Come on, you should get some to before he changes his mind." And before Chihiro could say anything, Rin grabbed her by the arm and pulled her out of bed.

…..

"Keeps the food coming; I want to try everything on the menu, and MORE!" yelled No-Face to the crowd, tossing nuggets in every direction. People tried to reach up and catch it, but half the time, a tongue would lash out and grab it. As the crowd stood in a mixture of confusion and greed, Ed maneuvered out to Eddy, who was busy enjoying one of the baths himself. "Well lumpy, how was your haul?"

"Mmmoohmmmmohmmohmmmohmm."  
"Is that so?" said Eddy, like he had a clue what Ed just said. "Why don't I take a look?"

With that, Ed opened his mouth and unrolled his tongue to reveal a mound of gold. Eddy was not sure whether to be dazed or disgusted by it. "Hey, where's Sockhead? I need to know what I'm raking in here!"

"Bogeys at three o' clock!" yelled Ed as he pointed upstairs to the dormitory floor, where he noticed Edd standing close to Chihiro.

"Oh well, we'd better see what's wrong. Come on Ed, and put the gold away. In a clean pocket, not that gaping hole some people call your mouth." Eddy said as he dried off.

Ed saluted, stern-faced, then reverted back to his normal self, shoveling the nuggets into a pocket deep in the recesses of his jacket.

…..

"Oh Chihiro, what are you doing here?" asked Edd.

"Rin told me something very big was happening here. But I lost her."

"Ah, well, I strongly advise not going down there. It's a feeding frenzy, and the guest has the most atrocious etiquette. Honestly, he is a guest granted, but there are limits to behavior one should maintain!"

For no real reason, Chihiro reached down for the cake again, only to find it wasn't there. She then realized that she had left it in her cot and ran back to her dorm. "Chihiro? Where are you going?" Edd asked as he followed her. About ten minutes later, Eddy and Ed arrived in the same spot they last saw Edd. "Okay big guy, tell me where he went, where's Double-D?"

Ed slammed his nose to the floor and began to sniff, eventually getting the trail and darting off in the direction of the dorms.

"Once again, something I expect from Rolf. I wonder if those two are related."

…..

Edd was staring out into the water that surrounded the bath house and waited for Chihiro to come back from her cot. While he was contemplating the train-line, whose tracks ran underwater, he heard rustling, and looked up to see a white, Asian dragon. "Chihiro, look at this! This place keeps getting stranger and stranger." Chihiro ducked out of her cot and ran to the porch and saw the dragon, surrounded by white flecks of something. "It's Haku! And he's in danger!"

"WHAT?!" exclaimed Edd, dumbstruck. The dragon seemed to be fighting the flecks, thrashing wildly and zigging around in random directions, until suddenly he went limp, and fell into the water. The flecks seemed to stop, but followed as the dragon Chihiro claimed was Haku, zoomed through the sea, and shot directly upwards, the flecks following at the same break-neck speed. "HEY SOCKHEAD!" yelled Eddy as he rounded the corner of the porch. "Sockhead, I need some one to check my inco-are you listening to me?" Edd grabbed Eddy's face and creaked it in the direction of Haku, who was currently fighting off the flecks again, which were now close enough to be identified as little bits of paper cut to shape humanoid birds. Haku, though fighting with all his might, seemed to be losing, and his movements became more and more sluggish. "HAKU!!! IN HERE!" yelled Chihiro and she opened the patio to her dorm. Before Eddy could protest, Haku darted in, and crashed into the wall, and Chihiro immediately began to close the patio to stop the swarm of paper monsters. The door seemed to jam however, and the swarm began slamming into her and the Eds, all, but Ed, were trying to close the door. Ed just looked at was going on, and then finally, his brain started working, and he pushed the door shut with a single hand. Then his brain shut down again. The clutter of paper that got in started to rise, slipped through the crack in the door, and limped off again. All but one. Chihiro turned to Haku, who was up, but far from relaxed. "Haku…everything's okay now. The birds are gone."

"Yeah lizard boy, we have stemmed the tide of the Ruinous Powers." Said Ed happily.

Instead of relaxing, Haku tensed even more and suddenly flew out the patio, heading for a higher floor. Chihiro watched him go up and turned to Edd. "Which floor was that?"

"Yubaba's living quarters. But I think its best that we stop no-"

"Come on then. We have to help him!" and Chihiro ran off. Edd following reluctantly. "She's family." He shrugged. Ed and Eddy drudged along behind. The prospect of not getting more money really put a damper on Eddy's mood. If he knew what was to happen, he probably would have screamed, running out the bathhouse.


	11. Chapter 11

**After a long amount of time, and requess to continue, I managed to get myself motivated again to not only continuewriting this, but actually write a draft that made some sense. The others seemed too half-baked. So I expect this to be completed in 3-4 more chapter, but then I'll be working on a new story. Something that happens after the Eds return form Japan.**

Chapter 11: A Moment of Idleness Brings a Lifetime of Edsanity

The bathhouse was in a riot. No-Face waddled through, basking in the attendants lining the hall, begging for tips. In front of No-Face dance the foreman "Come one come all!" he danced. "If you wanna get a tip, now's a good time!" No face, whose mask wasn't even in its proper position anymore, slowly trundled along, its body thrown completely out of proportion by the vast amounts of food it ate, caring not for the people that floundered at his feet, but for the face of a little girl. The girl currently called Sen. She was not there, but in fact trying to avoid attention and sneak up to Yubaba's chambers. Edd followed closely, desperately trying to keep his cousin in sight. Eddy and Ed trudged behind them, somewhat annoyed that they were missing some potential money-making opportunities. Trying to sneak through such a tightly packed crowd however was difficult. And sooner than she would have wanted, Chihiro was caught by one of the attendants to the elevator. "You, what are you doing?" he demanded in a cold tone.

"Please I have to go up!" Chihiro begged. Edd moved alongside her. "Yes we desperately need to go, someone is in danger!"

"I'm sure." the attendant replied, his tone implying he obviously didn't listening. To add an effect, he looked away from the two and at the arm he grabbed. His eyes widened as he noticed the red liquid it was covered in. "Ack. Blood!" and he let go, staring at his palm like the blood that was now on it would jump out and strangle him. "Now! Go, go, go!" Edd hissed, as he, Chihiro, and the other Eds crept by. The crowd shifted again, separating them, and pushing them in various directions. "Ed! Eddy!?" Edd yelled, trying to raise his voice above the clamor of sycophants. He turned and saw Chihiro had been pushed out and stood directly in the way of No-Face and the foreman. Chihiro recognized No-Face by his mask and bowed. "Thank you for your help yesterday, I really appreciated it."

The foreman's face turned into a snarl. "Hey, what are you doing here? Get out of his way!" the foreman yelled, pointing one of his folded fans in Chihiro's direction. No-Face reached out, grabbed, and flung the foreman out of the way. The arrogant voice was gone, and he went back to his shy voice, making meek noises, as gold flooded out of his hands. Slowly he held them up to Chihiro, implying her to take it all. Some nuggets fell to the ground, and people began to creep by to pick them up, Eddy included. "Eddy!" Edd hissed. "Now is not a good time!"

If Eddy heard, he gave no notice. The gold in front of his eyes seemed to hypnotize him, making him ignore everyone else around him.

Chihiro eyed the gold. "Thank you, but I am very busy right now." And with that, as if on queue, Ed bowled through the crown and grabbed Chihiro and Edd in each arm. "Elevator be this way guys!" he stated and bounded off. No-Face's hands began to shake violently, nuggets falling to the ground. Eddy's gold fever hit a lunatic high, as the glittering mesmerized him, oblivious to the furious spirit above him. The foreman walked over to No-Face slowly, hands knotted together, smiling apologetically. "Don't mind her; she was just a human girl, a new hired hand. Don't bother yourself over her."

The mask of No-Face twisted over to the foreman. "Stop laughing!" he demanded. The foreman looked confused. "You're still laughing. I said stop!" and with that he grabbed the Foreman, along with Eddy who was at his feet, his eyes never once leaving the gold in his hands. Not even when he was tossed into No-Face's mouth did he notice. Not even when he was swallowed whole with the foreman. No-Face's stomach rumbled. "I hit the jackpot baby!" came Eddy's muffled voice. "Wait, why's it so dark?"

……

"I know this might be a bad time to ask, but…where's Eddy?" Edd asked. It was indeed quite a bad time, hanging from a ladder outside the bathhouse, at least 30 feet from the ground. There was no turning around, as thanks to Ed's blunders, the pipe they had been using was ripped off its hinges, and it plummeted to the ground. Chihiro slowly started to climb up, then Edd, and Ed even slower.

"Sorry, but Haku is in real danger, we'll have to go back for him later." Chihiro called behind her. She grasped another rung and pulled herself up, and another, and hoisted herself slightly higher. Edd, moaning, followed timidly.  
Ed however was swinging from one of the ladder arms, waiting impatiently for the other two to move up. "Guys, can you hurry it up? I hear flapping." as if that meant something drastic.

Chihiro turned and saw a black figure soaring through the clouds. "Yubaba!" she exclaimed as the figure grew in size. "Come on, we have to hurry!" And she picked up her pace slightly.

Ed looked up, and saw that even with her newfound speed; she wouldn't reach the top for a while. So he reached up and grabbed a started Edd by the legs "Ed! What are you-WHOA!", and held him between his legs. Next, he jumped up, and grabbed Chihiro by the back of her dress and slung her over Edd. With both hands free, he raced up the ladder with a speed that left Chihiro and Edd screaming. And it didn't help when Ed forgot to stop when he ran out of ladder. However, the message barley managed to kick in fast enough for Ed to grab onto the ledge of a window. With single-minded determination, he swung his fist at the window, which practically vaporized under the force of his blow. Then he hauled himself and his two friends through the window, landing on the tiled floor in a pile of limbs. Chihiro was the first to recover, and ran down a hallway, turning left. Edd barely got feeling back into his legs and followed after. Ed recovered last. "Wow, let's do that again." He giggled, before getting up. "Huh. I think I'm lost now. Okay first rule of getting lost in the bathroom: PANIC!" and Ed ran screaming down the hallway, smacking face first into a mirror (and shattering it) and turned down the right.

……

"Where are we now?" Edd asked.

Chihiro looked about, careful not to step on the gigantic toys and pillows. "I think it's a giant nursery…" Yubaba's voice drifted into the room faintly.

"…it's just a No-Face. This is your fault because you get too greedy, not to mention attracting the worst guests. Look just wait there I'll be down in a moment." Chihiro edged closer to the door Yubaba's voice was emanating from and peeked through the door. Yubaba had just finished talking to someone over her skull-telephone thing and sighed. Then she turned. "Haku's bleeding all over the carpet. Get rid of him, he'll be dead soon anyways." she was about to leave, when she turned in Chihiro's direction. Chihiro let out a small gasp before she could stop herself, and without really thinking she ran back into the nursery. Edd was still standing there confused as ever. "What's going on Chihiro?"

"Just hide!" Was all she said and dived into a mound of pillows. Edd, catching the urgency in her voice, dived in a similar fashion under the massive bed. Just as Yubaba came in. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught the pillows moving slightly. She glided over and moved several of the pillows.

……

Yubaba prided herself in cleanliness. And her halls were spotless, and richly decorated. Absolutely peaceful. Then Ed rushed through, smashing through doors, tripping over tables, and knocking over priceless porcelain, all in desperation to find an elevator. If Yubaba saw this, she would have reduced Ed to a pile of dust. Lucky for him she wasn't there.

……

Baby groaned softly as the light hit his face. "Aww, did Baby hide under the cushions again?" Yubaba cooed. "Poor little Baby, I woke him up. Sorry. Let me kiss you and make it better." She continued. Under the bed, Edd gagged, he never did like baby-talk, though he wasn't sure why.

"Now you just go back to sleep." And she placed a pillow squarely on top of Baby's face. She picked up a few toys and threw them onto a couch, switched the lights off, and left the nursery, magically 'willing' the curtains to close behind her.

Just as she left, Chihiro let out a sigh of relief, and moved out of the pillows, and stopped halfway as a giant baby hand held her leg.

……

In a series of events that were too confusing to elaborate on, Ed had found himself on the elevator. By this point, his attention span had shifted to something else completely different, and was acting as a caller for each floor, figuring that would be the best way to run into someone he knew. Several spirits were in the elevator with him and eyed him nervously. They jumped when he suddenly shouted. "4th Floor! Soup! Underwear! DVDs! Laxatives! Mummies! And Mad Scientist Equipment!" as the door opened. All the spirits rushed out regardless of the fact it wasn't the floor they wanted. Anything to get out of the bathhouse. And away from that weirdo.

……

"You, you're a germ from outside to make me sick. That's what you are aren't you?" Baby demanded from Chihiro. Getting over the fact the baby was talking, Chihiro desperately replied, all while trying to get out of the baby's surprisingly strong grip. "No, I'm a human! Please let me go."

"You're going outside, you'll get sick if you go…Why not just stay here and play with me…" Baby said.

"I can't, my friend is really hurt. I'll play later, just please, let me go." Baby's attitude darkened.

"If you don't I'll cry, and then mom will come running in here and kill you. Now play with me before I break your arm!" he threatened, tightening his grip. Chihiro grunted in pain.

Just then the pillows were parted to reveal and angry Edd. "No one messes with my family." And with that he sneezed into one hand and held it up to Baby. "Look! I got germs! They'll make your arms fall off! Get away!" And he shoved his hand into Baby's face.

Baby immediately let go and shielded himself from Edd with a big cushion, and Edd grabbed Chihiro, and ran out the door.

……

"276th floor, Comic Books! Gravy! Ant Care Products! Ant Killing Products! Men's' Wear! Xuugiblickatcthh Wear!" Ed declared as he stepped out of the elevator. In reality he was on the first floor, and went relatively unnoticed to the surrounding spirits, thanks to the chaos stirred up by No-Face. Eddy must be down here, Ed thought, trying to scam someone out of their money. He looked around and saw that many customers were getting agitated by the lack of help and attention. Ed suddenly had a thought. And then that thought formed another, and another, each one making a little more sense until, he had an idea. The foreman was busy being digested by No-Face, and so his token stall was unmanned. Ed grabbed as many as he could carry and moved over to the big tub, where he sent a request down to Kamaji. A few moments later the tube came down, and Ed let it go. But instead of aiming for the tub, he walled off the Big Tub stall with buckets and rags (Also left lying around) and proceeded to pull out a bag of balloons from somewhere deep in his pocket. Brushing off the bits of mold, pocket lint, and rotten food, he opened the bag, and started to fill the balloons with bathwater. "Water fight!" he declared and hurled the first balloon at a spirit. The spirit, angry enough, became furious by the water it was suddenly splashed with. Especially while it was drying off. Thinking it was the spirit next to him, it took its soaked towel and slapped its neighbor with it. After wards, the spirits erupted into a water fight, their tubes being bought down, flooding the bath stalls, and the entire floor. For that matter, until the entire floor was flooded. Ed looked around at the ensuing disorder and smiled. Eddy would be so happy. Or would he? Happy about what? Ed forgot what he was doing and trundled off, waiting for something to kick start his brain.

……

"Get off of him!" Chihiro shrieked, and threw the green heads off of Haku's dragon form. Just as quickly, they moved to another section and tried to push him off. Then some bird with Yubaba's head started harassing Edd, who until then was keeping the heads from pushing Haku off. The fighting suddenly froze with a loud rip of curtains and upholstery. Baby stumbled into the room, his huge form towering over them all. "I mean it now! You better play with me or I'll cry!"

"Back off! I got germs!" Edd shouted, holding up his hand. Baby scoffed and slapped his hand away, causing Double D to spin. "I'm not afraid." I mean it now. I'll cry." He threatened his eyes starting to water. Just before Baby could turn on his water works, a paper bird came off of Chihiro's back.

"What a spoiled brat." It said in a familiar voice. "Ooh, you're a fat one aren't you? A real porker"

"Yubaba?" Edd stammered as he struggled to get up.

The paper landed on the carpet and a transparent form of Yubaba came out of the floor. "Hmph.", she said. "Still transparent. Gotta fix that."

Baby looked at the ghost-Yubaba in confusion. "Mama?"

The form turned to him, scowling. "You pea-brain, can't you tell me from your mother?" and she flicked her wrist. Before their very eyes, Baby transformed into a fat mouse. "There, now your brain size matches your head." She smiled.

"Now what else can we mess with?" she asked to no one. The heads began to hop away as fast as they could and the crow-thing tried to fly out a window, but with a slight of the ghost-Yubaba's hand turned the crow into a small sparrow, and the heads all lined up with each other and became Baby. "Ooh what fun!"

She then turned to Chihiro. "This is our little secret. Try to blab and I'll tear your pretty little throat out."

Chihiro stared for a moment. "Who are you?"

"I? I am Zeniba, twin sister to Yubaba. And I must thank you for leading me to this nuisance's hide-away." Zeniba pointed to Haku.

"What do you want with him?"

"He took my gold seal. I want it back!"

"No! Haku would never do that, he's a good person!"

Zeniba laughed. "If only that were true! You know why he became my sister's apprentice? To steal her secrets. And now he's stealing mine the greedy lizard."

She took another step closer. "Move aside. My seal is cursed, and anyone that tries to steal it will die."

Her monologue was interrupted as the New Baby began to try and smash the mouse and sparrow that struggled to run away. Zeniba turned to them, face contorted with rage. "Will you cut that out, do you want my sister up here?" Using this distraction the mouse and sparrow clambered onto Chihiro.

Haku rose and with a lash of his tail, smashed the paper doll on the floor. Zeniba's form grew a split down the middle and began to separate. "Ow a paper cut." Was all she said before fading away. Haku then lost consciousness again and began to slip down the hole. "No! Edd help me!"

Edd who had been staring at the events before him, looked back at Chihiro, and grabbed Haku by the tail. However, too much of him was already over the side and they all plummeted down.

……

Ed somehow managed to wander back upstairs into Baby's Nursery. "How'd I end up here again?" he pondered. Shrugging he walked out the door to Yubaba's study, where he saw the largest baby ever staring back at him. Ed stared for approximately three more seconds.

Two.

One.

"Augh! MUTANT BABY MONSTER!" he cried and ran circles around the room, crashing through Yubaba's desk, toppling her bookshelves, and jumped out the window. Where his jacket snagged on a pipe. "I'm safe!" he happily declared. The New Baby peered out at him. Ed let out another scream before ripping the pipe off at its hinges, causing it to bend over and swing him around like a wrecking ball straight for the bathhouse wall. With a loud 'crash!', Ed toppled over into the 'female only' portion of the bathhouse, leaving a gaping hole in the wall for all to peer into. The screams were drowned out only by Ed's screaming.

……

They were plummeting. Plummeting. Plummeting. And plummeting some more. Edd clung dearly to Haku's tail ad Chihiro desperately tried to wake him. "Haku please, wake up!" she yelled, and gripped him by the horns. For a moment to Edd, it looked like Chihiro was in a trance, like she was somewhere else. Then Haku suddenly found new strength, and came to, soaring up the hole. It was short-lived however, as he started to slow his ascent, and eventually cut it short, by diving into a ventilation shaft. Crashing through a fan, Chihiro landed straight onto Kamaji, Edd onto a pile of Sootballs, and Haku into Kamaji's drawers of herbs. Edd groaned slightly as he was a tad stuck in his position. His head was against the floor, his back against the wall, and his legs dangling right in front of his face.

"Ack! What's going on?!" Kamaji exclaimed.

"Haku!" screamed Chihiro, as she rushed over to his thrashing form.

"Looks like he's bleeding from the inside. I think he done swallowed something bad." Kamaji noted as he crawled over.

"You think this'll help push out whatever's in there?" Edd asked, holding up the River God's gift from his uncomfortable position.

"Hey yeah! Wait…how did you know?" Chihiro asked.

"I'll tell you later. Right now just give him whatever that is. I don't think Haku can vomit that much blood for much longer.

Chihiro, needing no further prompting, pried open his mouth, and shoved the River God's cake into Haku's mouth. The effect was instant, as Haku started to gag. And thrash wildly. Chihiro held Haku down as the cake did its magic, purging Haku's system. His neck bulged, and a black gooey mass came rocketing out of his mouth and landing not too far from the furnace. The gooey mass slowly began to move, and congeal into a worm-like mass. Then it sprouted eyes.

"What in the name of all that's holy is that supposed to be?!" Edd yelled.

"Whatever it was it was on the seal!" Chihiro replied.

"Get that slug hurry!" Kamaji exclaimed and Chihiro rushed over, the slug bounding away towards the soot holes. It was only met with a swarm of angry soot balls, and it rushed to find other shelter, only to be squished by Edd as he rolled over onto his stomach. "Ewww…That was my best shirt." He groaned.

Kamaji pointed a long finger at Edd. "Those things are cursed boy! Get over here before its bad luck rubs off on you!"

Considering everything else that happened today, Edd was taking no chances with a cursed slug and ran up to Kamaji, who promptly instructed him how to get rid of any potential curses.

"That was from Zeniba's." Chihiro said breathlessly.

"Zeniba's monogrammed gold seal?! That's as powerful as magic gets!" Kamaji exclaimed.

As they spoke, Haku transformed back into his human form. "He looks even worse off now." Edd commented.

"Poor boy." Kamaji agreed. "I remember when he came here. He was just like you, lost, confused. Then he got mixed up with Yubaba. I warned him not to get stuck in with her and just go home but he told me he had no home." Kamaji sighed and moved Haku onto his bed, and put a small cup of sake to his lips. "Hopefully he'll be more comfortable that way."

"After he became Yubaba's apprentice, his face turned pale. And his eyes steely." He continued. "Never was the same after."

"I need to take the seal back to Zeniba, maybe she'll forgive him if I do."

Kamaji rubbed his scalp. "Zeniba's home? But she's just as dangerous as her sister."

Chihiro would not let up. "Haku helped me, and I want to help him now in return. Right Edd?"

"What? Oh uh…yes of course, after all I too am in debt to him." He stammered, somewhat reluctant to go to a witch as dangerous as Yubaba.

Kamaji looked between the two and sighed. "Well, if you're all certain. I know how to get you there, but from that point you're on your own.." He moved over to a stack of drawers next to his usual workplace, and began to rummage through them.

"Excuse me." She turned to the soot balls. "I'm going to need my shoes. And my clothes."

"So will I." Edd said in a tired voice. The soot balls immediately reacted and swarmed into their holes to bring out the clothes they wore when they came to the bathhouse. Just then, Rin came in. "I've been looking all over for you I-" she looked around. "What happened here, what's with all the blood?"

"Long story."

"Anyway Yubaba is looking for you Sen. She is furious. The guest upstairs is actually a monster named No-Face, saying that you let him in."

Edd turned to Chihiro. "Is that true?"

Chihiro hesitated, trying to find a good answer. "I thought he was a guest."

"He's no guest; he's a monster, he already ate three employees, Eddy is one of them."

"What?! What about Ed?" Edd asked, now in a panic.

"I thought he was with you." Rin said.

"Uh oh. Ed always had someone around to guide him and tell him what to do. Even in school, there were always teachers and faculty around to point him around. With no guidance whatsoever, an over active imagination, a short attention span, and being in such a foreign place like this bathhouse. Who knows what he'll do?" Edd slapped a hand over his eyes in exasperation.

"How bad can it be?" Rin dismissed.

……

It was pretty bad. Ed had found his way onto the roof, and it was windy. If fact the moment he stepped onto the roof, he found himself getting blown back. "I shall not be defeated!" he declared and stamped his feet into the roof, knocking tiles over left and right. The wind was still quite a strong and Ed found himself uprooted and blown off the roof. "I have been defeated! Lamentable day! Hey I know the word lamentable." Ed said to himself, before crashing into the dorms. "Hello? Where'd the lights go out to?" Ed stumbled out of the dorms wrapped in layers of blankets. "Where am I?" he said to no one as he stumbled out of the dorms. No one seemed to notice or care that Ed was tumbling about n a heap of blankets, as some actually assumed he was just another customer, albeit very strange looking. Ed stumbled about blinded, being bumped this way and that. When he finally managed to tear the blankets off, he found that he was in the bathhouse kitchen. Coincidentally, his stomach growled. "I'm hungry." He stated. There was no one about as they were dealing with No-Face, so Ed tucked in on the closest dish.

……

"It can get pretty bad when Ed's involved." Edd said quietly.

"I found them!" Kamaji declared at last. Coming back, he produced several train tickets. "Been saving these for forty years, but I think you have a better use for these." He handed them to Chihiro. "Now Zeniba lives at the train's sixth stop called Swamp Bottom. And be warned, the train no longer makes round trips so once your there, you'll have to find another way to come back."

"Alright, we'll walk back following the tracks." Chihiro replied.

"Oh my, rigorous exercise." Edd groaned to himself, not relishing the prospect of a potential miles-long trek.

Chihiro ignored him and walked over to Haku. "Don't worry, I'll get Zeniba to forgive you, and you'll be better." She smiled softly.

"What about No-Face?" Rin asked impatiently.

"I'll deal with that now." Chihiro replied.

"What is up with that?" Rin asked.

"Something you wouldn't understand. It's called love." Kamaji replied.


	12. Chapter 12

**Even I'm surprised how quickly I cranked this one out. Well, one more chapter and this is done. Next story won't be "The Cat Returns" as that's gonna have a bit of hiatus till I can figure out how to incorporate the Eds so that they are more than just background. **

Chapter 12: IndegEDstion

"Now calm down now. Sen is coming. I called for her already." Yubaba's voice sounded from behind the door.

"Where is she?! I want Sen now!" No-Face demanded, now using Eddy's more commanding voice.

"Yubaba, we found her." And attendant said.

Yubaba poked her head out. "Well it's about time!" she stepped out to face Chihiro and Edd, but first reassured NO-Face. "Sen has arrived sir, and will be with you in just a few moments." She turned to Chihiro. "Where have you been all this time anyway? That monstrosity is costing us a fortune, so you had better suck up to him for every last scrap of gold you can get and-ugh what are those disgusting vermin doing here?" she pointed to the mouse and sparrow perched on Chihiro's shoulder. The mouse looked dejected at her tone.

Edd looked puzzled. "You don't recognize them?"

"Why should I? Get in there now!" and she shoved Sen into the room. "Here's Sen sir." And she closed the doors behind her. Edd was about to follow her in when Yubaba stopped him. "Not so fast Edd, No-Face asked for Sen, not you. And until he does, you will not set foot in there. Try anything otherwise and I'll turn you to coal!"

Edd bit his lip. "But will she be alright by herself?"

She glared at Edd. "If you wanna take her place, go ahead, and see how far that gets you."

……

Ed had finally eaten his full. With a contented sigh, he left the kitchen, which now looked like a rampaging bear had been through it. With his stomach full, his mind was able to stray onto other subjects, and one prominent subject sprang to mind. "Where's my yo-yo?" and Ed bean to rummage in his pockets. He didn't find it, but instead found a handful of glittering gold. Ed suddenly remembered. "Oh yeah, Eddy wanted me to get gold!" he slapped a fist into his right hand. "How was I doing that now? And where's Eddy? Eddy? Where are you?" and Ed wandered off again.

…… 

No-Face was a shadow of the timid ghost that crept into the bathhouse. He was now enormous, bloated with food, which juggled with each breath he took. He picked up one of the bowls that still had food. "Come Sen, try some, it's delicious." A mouth below the mask formed a massive smile. "Want some gold? I'm not giving any to anyone else." He said, now switching to the foreman's voice.

Chihiro sat rooted to her spot, looking back at No-Face with a calm front, but inside was quite frightened. Baby on her shoulder cringed and desperately tried to hide behind Chihiro's hair.

No Face moved closer to her, his massive form causing the floor to shake with each step. "What do you want Sen? Anything you want, I will grant it. So what is it?"

Chihiro looked at No-Face straight at his mask. "I need to leave sir; I have to go somewhere very important." This wasn't what No-Face was expecting as a response, and the mouth gave away its dismay. "And you might want to leave as well, Yubaba doesn't want you here. Please go home."

No-Face's mask withdrew into its massive body like turtle retracting its head. "But I have no friends or family. I'm alone, all alone. I want Sen, please Sen. Take the gold." It held out its hand and gold flowed out of its hand.

As No-Face's hand slid around Chihiro's face, Baby reached out and bit into its hand. "Ow!" it exclaimed as it withdrew its hand, trying to slap the little creature that hurt it.

Chihiro, suddenly had an idea. "Please, you should eat this. I was saving it for my parents but I think you need it more." And she threw the rest of the River God's cake into No-Faces gaping mouth. The purging effect was almost instantaneous. Globs of black sludge began to pour from its mouth as it moaned in pain. "Sen. What did you do to me?! What did you do?!" it exclaimed using all its stolen voices at once and lunged at her. Chihiro jumped out of the way in horror, and ran out. She grabbed Edd by the wrist and dragged him along. "Chihiro?! What's going on?" Just as he finished No face battered down the doors, almost flattening two employees, and trailed after her. "Oh I see." And Edd's pace began to quicken, terror giving him extra strength. Chihiro turned and continued to run, past employees and guests alike, while No-Face struggled to keep up, his enormous bulk slowing it and throwing off its balance. Yubaba jumped in front of Chihiro. "Enough! I don't care if he is rich, this is enough!" and threw a ball of energy at No-Face, which only succeeded in making the spirit nauseous again, as it spewed forth another wave of vomit straight into Yubaba, covering her in digested food so much that only her giant nose protruded out. Out of the muck, came Eddy's disoriented face. "I have seen more of the digestive system then I'll ever wanna see again.", and then passed out.

Chihiro pulled Edd along down another flight of stairs, and sharply turning just as No-Face smashed into the wall where they were just moments ago. He stopped, to puke up the foreman, who in a daze looked up at the thing that ate him. "Now that's an esophagus."

"I'll get you for this Sen." It panted as it hocked another gob of puke out.

"Uh what exactly did you do to him now?" Edd asked Chihiro, slowing to a power-walk, as No-Face could only stumble along, leaving a trail of puke slowly streaming out of its mouth. It had another violent spasm and threw up again. "Excuse me." It muttered. By now, Edd and Chihiro could easily out walk the spirit.

……

Ed was deep in thought. When he was this deep, all outer stimuli was ignored. He ignored the giant No-Face that moments ago threw up on him and rushed passed, nor did he notice that everyone was hiding from it. He just continued to walk along, trying to figure out where Eddy might be. The last lace he saw him was on the second floor. So he might try that again. Sure enough, Eddy was passed out in a puddle of nasty smelling vomit. "Eddy! I have found you! You my friend are now un-lost!" He smiled as he held up Eddy's prone form under one of his arms. "Let us depart!" he declared and made for the dormitories. He didn't even notice the squeal of pain that issued from the muck as he accidentally stepped on Yubaba who was still underneath the puke.

……

"Sen!" Lin called out. She was in a small boat at the base of the steps. Chihiro jumped in. "Come on Edd. Hurry."

"One moment." He turned. "Yeah, he's still following. Let's go." And he too jumped in.

"Over here!" Chihiro called to No-Face, who was walking in a daze along a massive pipe.

"Don't call him over!" Lin exclaimed.

"The bathhouse must have made him crazy, but he should be alright now."

"And how do you know that?"

"I don't."

"Well that's reassuring."

"Can't you see the difference?" Edd asked. "He's skinnier, and slower, and seems a lot more confused about where he is."

No-Face watched the boat paddle away for a brief moment before jumping in after them.

"Well great, now he's following."

"He always was. Besides, he's harmless now."

No-Face swam along, catching up with the boat steadily until it began to gag again. It surfaced and hacked up the very first thing it swallowed: the talking frog. It blinked for a moment before swimming back to the bathhouse.

"You'll half to go on foot from here." Lin explained. "The train stop is over there, now go. Be safe!" Lin said before turning around.

"We will. Thanks." Chihiro replied

As she paddled back, she noticed No-Face. "No-Face s you so much as scratch them I'll put you in a world of hurt!" If No-Face even acknowledged her, it gave no sign.

Chihiro, Edd and the animals waited for the train, which came almost instantly after they were on the train stop. Chihiro ran up to a car and the conductor came out. The conductor didn't really have anything where his face was supposed to be and so simply used hand gestures to show what he was saying. "Excuse me sir, we want to go to Swam Bottom.", she said holding up five tickets. The conductor took them, counted off the tickets, and then pointed to someone behind her. She turned and saw No-Face there as well, much to Edd's shock.

"How did he get here so fast?"

"Do you want to come along" Chihiro asked. No-Face nodded. "Yes, he's with us."

With that the conductor shredded the tickets and made for the front o the train. Chihiro, Edd and No-Face got on, taking whatever vacant seats were available. "Well we're off now…" Edd said, a tad more cryptically than he meant to.

The day slowly ebbed away and the number of other passengers diminished with it.

……

With a start, Haku woke up. "Where am I?"

Kamaji woke at his voice. "Oh Haku, you're alright. You blacked out and little Sen helped you."

"Yes, I remember darkness then Sen calling out my name. Next thing I know I woke up here feeling better than ever."

"Pure Love. She broke the spell Zeniba placed on you and is returning the gold seal to her even now. She did it to save you."

……

"This sucks." Eddy muttered. He, Ed, the frog, and the foreman we all prostrated before Yubaba, waiting or her to calm down. Eddy was in a sulky mood, as he had to return all the gold he had rightfully earned to Yubaba. It was that or be turned into a pig. Yubaba was still furious about No-Face even though she was properly cleaned up. Next to her, Baby was happily gorging himself on cookies, and candy. "This is it?! This gold doesn't even begin to cover the expenses that No-Face made. Ravaging the Kitchen, blasting a hole through the female changing quarters." She grunted. Eddy looked up slightly, angry. That mound of gold was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, and it was just out of his grasp. And here was Yubaba dismissing it as useless. It was enough to make him sick. "Sen didn't get nearly enough, and then she runs off! She'll have to be punished!"

The frog looked up. "But Yubaba, she led No-Face out, you have to see that as something." The foreman and Eddy nodded in agreement.

"So?! She let in that abomination in the first place! And to top it all off she took her cousin and left her family and friends behind. Those pigs must be fat enough by now. I say cook them up!" she declared, causing the two Eds and the foreman to cringe.

"Yubee doobie doo is getting scary now."

"If you get my name wrong one more time your joining them!"

Haku then strode in with confidence. "Wait a minute."

Yubaba turned to Haku. "You're still alive are you?"

"Have you even noticed that something precious to you has been replaced?" Yubaba eyed him for a moment. "What's this now? Talking to me in that tone? Is that any way to treat your master?"

Haku stared at her unflinching and Yubaba returned with an even glare. Then something sparked in her head, and she took a nugget and examined it. It seemed alright. Eddy stealthily took out one of the nuggets he 'forgot' to give to Yubaba to see is there was anything wrong with it.

"Very clever young man." Yubaba smiled as she put the nugget back. Haku didn't even break his gaze once and the staring contest resumed. "This is getting tense guys." Ed said.

Haku stood there, then just for the briefest of a second, switched hi gaze to Baby before returning it to Yubaba. Yubaba apparently picked it up and then eyed Baby with suspicion, with a gesture, Baby's head was replaced with that of one of the three heads. It seemed to notice that the spell was broken and Baby instantly broke apart into the three heads, which then hopped desperately out of the room, leaving a very stunned audience behind. "My baby…" Yubaba uttered in horror. Next to her, the gold began to disintegrate. Yubaba shrieked, knocking the mound aside and flew out of the room. Ed caught some of the flying specks with his face. "It's dirt." He said aloud. The frog, foreman, and Eddy pulled out their stashed nuggets and to their horror, found it had all turned to dirt.

Yubaba sprinted into Baby's nursery. "Sweeitie? Where are you? Come out Baby." She shouted as she tore the room apart looking for Baby. Haku strode in calmly, which Yubaba noticed. Fire began to spew from her mouth and her hair flew wildly. She pointed an accusing finger. "You!" And she flew at Haku. "What have you done to my baby?!" she yelled. Behind Haku Ed and Eddy cringed in terror. "Yubalee doobally is really scary now Eddy.:

"Not cool." Was all Eddy could say, and he repeated it over and over.

"He's with your sister." Haku replied calmly

"Zeniba?!" Yubaba exclaimed, the fires extinguished, and her hair falling. Now she looked more tired than anything, as she motioned a chair under her to prop her up.

"I see Haku. Very clever. You'll get my Baby back but at a price yes? So what is it?"

"Tear up her contract." He turned to the Eds. "And the Eds'. And you will send them all with Sen's parents back to the human world."

Yubaba huffed. "Fine, but on one condition. I get to administer one final test to Sen, if she fails, they're all mine for good."

"No. That's a load." Eddy protested. "You put us through back breaking labor, nearly get us killed, and you still have to have it your way? We hold al the cards here you old bi-"

"Deal." Haku said, much to Eddy's dismay.

"I don't like this game anymore Yubaba." Ed said, getting her name right for the first time.


	13. Chapter 13

**And I am done. Nothing else to say but enjoy, and hope it lived up to the expectation of the readers.**

Chapter 13: SpiritED Home

The train slowly skidded to a stop. One by one, Chihiro, Edd and No-Face made their way off the train.

"So where now?" Edd asked.

Chihiro looked around; there was only one dirt road in the swamp. "That way I hope."

And they got off the train stop, and trotted off. The swamp was in complete contrast to the bathhouse they had spent so much time in. There were no buildings, nothing to show that anyone lived here save the dirt road that seemed to stretch for an eternity. About an hour down, there was a small light bobbing up and down, a small squeaking noise following its bobbing rhythm. Edd tensed preparing himself to see something grotesque. As it came closer it looked like a lamppost hopping on one foot. Edd recoiled slightly but Chihiro and No-Face gave it a slight bow. Edd opted to follow them and copied them. The lamppost bowed as well, turned and went back up the path. "I'm guessing we follow that?" Edd asked/

"Of course."

"It figures I guess." Edd sighed.

The lamppost would hop ahead of them, and then would stop for a moment or them to catch up, only to continue on once they got close enough. Slowly it led them to a cleared out patch of land, where there was a modest looking house surrounded by a fence. The lamppost hopped all the way to the fence's arch way before jumping up and tying itself to the buttress. "Zeniba's abode I presume." Edd said aloud, expecting Zeniba's voice to ring out and drag them in. But nothing happened. So they slowly walked towards the front door, which opened just as Chihiro was about to knock. "Come in." said a soft voice. Edd took a deep breath and walked in. Looking around he motioned to Chihiro who followed him in, and then No-Face. The door closed, with Zeniba facing them from behind the door. "So you made it. Sit down now, I'll make some tea."

Chihiro walked up to Zeniba who was tending to a stove. "Excuse me ma'am but Haku stole this from you, and I came to give it back." Chihiro told her, holding up the seal.

Zeniba took it in one hand, and eyed it. "I see. You know what this is?"

"Your golden seal, which Haku stole. I came to apologize for him." And she bowed. "Sorry." Edd and No-Face followed her example. "Yes we apologize in his stead as he is still recovering."

Zeniba didn't take her eyes off them. "He sliced me in two you know. And I still haven't gotten over that. It really hurt." She then looked at the seal. "Strange the protective spell I put on it is gone."

"You mean the black slug that was on your seal?" Chihiro asked and Zeniba looked up at her.

"I uhm…a-accidentally rolled over it a-a-and…er…squished it." Edd stammered.

Zeniba's eyes widened. "Squished?!" and she broke out into laughter. "That wasn't my slug! That was my sister's slug that she used to control Haku with." She turned to Edd, tears welling in her eyes. "And you squished it." and she was unable to contain her laughter anymore, and let it out. Edd looked confused.

"So it wasn't yours?"

"No." she smiled warmly. "But still what happened to my spell? Only love could break it. Come." She motioned them al to sit at a table.

"I can see where this is going." Edd said to himself.

Chihiro turned midway to the table and pointed to the mouse and sparrow on her shoulder. "Can you turn these two back?"

Zeniba looked at them and said. "That spell wore off ages ago. They are free to turn back at any time they want. Don't you want to?"

The two little animals shook their heads.

……

"I don't believe it, what would possess Haku to do something like that?" Eddy asked to himself as the bathhouse filled itself with its usual customers. "Agree to a deal for Sen's contract?"

"No idea buckaroo." Ed said, having no idea what they were talking about.

"I mean, she risks her neck to save Haku, lures No-Face out of the bathhouse, and risks her life getting it as far away from here as possible, and Yubaba still wants to punish her for it." some of the employees were overhearing the conversation, though they pretended not to. Even a lot of the customers stopped their usual chatter, and were listening in.

"I mean Haku had the perfect Ace. Bring back Yubaba's kid and then Chihiro and we could go free. So why'd he agree to the test? I mean, you heard what happens if she messes up. We get stuck here for good. Then we'll never get home." Eddy rested his head on his mop. "I mean, what's the point in having gold if you can't go anywhere to spend it?" the bathhouse was starting to grow so silent that many spirits on the second floor could hear Eddy.

"I really dunno Eddy. Maybe it's to…uh…I forgot what I was saying, what were we talking about?" a wave of groans from the peanut gallery.

"Sen you twit! Edd's cousin? The one that saved that River God? The one whose parents are now pigs, and the only reason they aren't being eaten is because she's working here? The one that went off to find a cure for Haku? That one?"

"Oh yeah."

"You mean the human girl?" asked one of the attendants from the next tub over.

"Yeah, of course I am." Eddy replied impatiently. He didn't care who was listening, he was angry and he was going to make damn sure everyone around him knew why.

……

Tea was set out along with cake, cookies, and a few other sweets. No-Face was helping himself to some of the cake, while the mouse Baby, nibbled away at a cookie. Edd was calmly drinking his tea while Chihiro and Zeniba talked.

"I don't usually get along with my sister. She's so obnoxious, as I'm sure you know. She's so tacky. I'm sure you know, working there for so long. It's ironic that though were identical in every physical way, but are personalities are so different." She sipped her tea. "I'm sorry that she turned your parents into pigs, but there is nothing I can do. I have nothing that could help them. I'm afraid you'll have to find your own way. Try using what you remember about them."

"Can't you help me even a little more than that? I feel like I met Haku before, but I can't remember when."

Zeniba leaned in. "That's a good start. Once you meet someone you never really forget them. Just think about it and give your memories some time to catch up. I'll be working with the boys to make you something." She got up and walked to her sewing kit. "Oh and I'd like you to start calling me granny from now on."

Edd chocked on his tea. "That's a strange offer coming from a woman that turned a giant baby into a little mouse."

"Isn't it?" Zeniba smiled.

……

"No-Face where did you learn to spin thread? You're really good at this." Zeniba said, sewing something small together. Chihiro was curled on a chair by the door, and Edd was close by drinking even more tea. "Anything come yet?" Edd asked, patting Chihiro on the back. She shook her head, and got up, "I can't remember a thing."

She walked over to Zeniba. "Please, I need more help. Haku could already be dead, ad my parents eaten." She sniffed, tears welling in her eyes.

Zeniba looked up momentarily then returned to her sewing. "Wait just a little longer." She made a hair band and handed it to Chihiro. There we go, put it on."

Chihiro looked at it, dazzled. "It's beautiful…"

Zeniba's eyes twinkled. "It'll protect you. It is made from the threads your friends wove together."

"Thank you." And she started to tie her hair together.

Edd shook his head incredulously. "Well now I'm confused how will that help?"

Zeniba looked to him and smiled. If she was going to say anything, she was interrupted by a loud tapping n her windows.

"What good timing, we have another guest will you let him in?" she asked Chihiro.

Chihiro nodded and ran to the door. Edd, being closer, opened the door for her. "I got it." he said and looked out, and a look of surprise spread across his face. "Chihiro?"  
"Yes?"

"What was that thing you gave Haku?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Cause unless that is his ghost, he's made a complete recovery."

Chihiro's eyes widened and she ran to the door. There was Haku in his dragon form, with out a scratch on him. Chihiro ran out, and hugged him. "Haku…you're alive. Look granny, Haku's alive!"

The door widened open as Zeniba came to look. 'Aww cute.' She mouthed to Edd.

"That's love for you."

She walked out and faced Haku, who kneeled his head down. "Haku." She said. "I will forgive you for stealing my seal…but in return you must take care of this girl." She looked to Baby, who was still a mouse, being held aloft by the flapping sparrow. "Okay it's time for you to go home but come back to visit sometimes." And the mouse lightly kissed her on the nose. She turned to No-Face. "You know No-Face; I could use another hand here, would you like to stay here?" No-Face nodded.

"I guess this is where we part ways then." Edd said, and Zeniba turned to him.

"Yes it is. Be sure to think about me." She hugged Edd, who returned it slowly. "I will…thanks for helping my cousin, Granny."

Chihiro ran over to Zeniba. "Granny!" she called as she raced into her embrace. "Thank you so much. I'll miss you."

"Don't worry, you'll be fine Sen." She replied.

"Her real name is Chihiro just so you know." Edd said.

"Chihiro." Zeniba said to herself, then turning to Chihiro. "What a pretty name. You take good care of it. Off you go now."

Chihiro and Edd mounted Haku, and Chihiro called over "Granny take care!" while Edd simply waved, which was a lot for him, as it was all he could do not to cling to Haku in fear of the oncoming flight. Haku glided lightly at first, but slowly picked up speed, and ascended into the sky. To better keep herself on his back, Chihiro grabbed his horns and bent her body down, Edd tried with mixed success as he held to Haku's constantly shifting midsection. "Chihiro! Could you move up a bit?"

Chihiro wasn't responding. She seemed to be in trance.

"Chihiro?"

"I remember now!" She suddenly said, almost making Edd lose his grip, causing him to slide around to Haku's underside, leaving Edd gripping onto Haku's forelimbs. "Remember what?!"

"She leaned over. "Haku…I just remembered something from long time ago.

I think it may help you. Once, when I was little I dropped my shoe into the river."

"Don't tell me you tried to grab it." Edd called from Haku's arms.

"I did." Edd groaned. "And when I tried to I fell in. I thought I was going o drown, but the water carried to shore. It finally came back to me. The River's name was the Kohaku River." She looked at Haku. "I remember, that was you; and your real name is Kohaku River!" Haku's eyes widened. And his scales all came flying off. The all blew away like leaves, leaving only Haku gripping Chihiro, and Edd and they all fell earthward. Edd had only time for one thought before terror gripped him. 'Not this again.'

"You did it Chihiro!" Haku declared happily. "I remember now. I am the Kohaku River!"

"You're a River Spirit?" Chihiro chimed.

"Some help please?!" Edd wailed as he comically began to flap his arms like a bird.

"But I thought that river was filled for apartments now." Chihiro said.

"That must be why I can't fin my way home. I remember your shoe, I remember carrying you."

"So that was you that saved me." She cried happily and they embrace each other.

"Yes this is all real romantic, but the falling?! Can we deal with that first?!"

Just before they hit the surface, they stopped and shot back into the sky. Edd opened took his hands off his eyes and noticed he was flying along with Chihiro and Kohaku, following them. Edd scratched his head. He could see Chihiro holding hands with Haku, that's how she was flying, but how was he? He saw just the briefest glitter of something going down to his pocket. He reached in and found a small wooden charm. Zeniba must have put it in his pocket while they were hugging. Whatever the case, some near invisible line was keeping him tied to Kohaku, but he was bobbing up and down like a bell buoy. He clamped one hand over his mouth, while the other clung tightly to the little wooden charm. The three few off into the rising sun and if this would have been a good place to end the story. But there were still a few loose ends to tie up first…

……

"So friggin tense…" was all Eddy could say. Yubaba had ordered him and Ed to stay around her to ensure that they couldn't get into anymore trouble, after the rousing protests last night, she wanted to make sure Eddy wasn't around to rile up the staff again.

Yubaba continued to pace around the bridge to the bathhouse, waiting for Haku's return. Lin peered up from the wall. And pointed to the sky. "Hey there they are!" she said, and all around her the bathhouse faculty climbed onto the walls for a better look, and the customers came over watching from the balconies. Yubaba looked up to see Chihiro and Haku land gracefully on the ground. Edd however, unceremoniously landed on his butt, his face slightly pale. "I'm going to be sick." He muttered but managed to force everything from coming up.

"Whoa, Double D looks real sick now." Ed stated as he peered over the other side of the bridge, a hand over his eyes to block the sun. Eddy nodded.

"Must have been on heck of a ride."

Yubaba curled her lip in a scowl. "I see you still haven't returned my Baby." Yubaba grunted as Haku and Chihiro landed. She wasn't even aware of the mouse that was slowly changing back into the massive Baby just above her. He landed with a ground shaking thud directly in front of her, shocking Yubaba, the tenants, and the employees alike.

"Mama!" he exclaimed happily.

"My Baby!" Yubaba cried, embracing her giant child. "Did they hurt you? And you're standing by yourself, when did that happen?" Yubaba was on the verge of crying.

Haku took a step. "Don't forget your end of the bargain Yubaba!"

She gave Haku a hard look. "Not so fast, there's still the test." A chorus of boos erupted from behind her. "Oh shut up!" and almost instantly they did.

"That's enough mama." Baby said. "Lever her alone." Yubaba turned back.

"Sen and I had a really good time. Don't be like that."

"But a deal is a deal sweetie; part of the bargain was that I give her a final test." Yubaba cooed.

"If you make Sen cry I won't ever forgive you/" he said with finality. Yubaba chocked.

"But, baby I-"

"He granny!" Chihiro called.

"Granny?!" Yubaba exclaimed.

"Granny?" Eddy asked, looking over to Ed, who had disappeared. "Ed?"

"A deal's a deal." Chihiro continued as she walked across the bridge. She turned to Baby. "Don't worry. It'll be alright."

Yubaba coughed. "Humph, you really got guts I'll give you that. Come with me." She turned to Baby. "One minute please."

She walked to the entrance where there were two rows of pigs. "See if you can tell which of these pigs is your parents and I'll rip up your contract. You get one try." She said, holding Chihiro's contract.

"What?! That's impossible! They all look alike! If only Ed was here." Eddy muttered.

"If only Ed were here." Edd said to himself.

"Ed won't be needed." Haku said calmly.

There was a loud cracking noise but it went unnoticed.

Chihiro scanned the pigs for a minute. Then two. She had a puzzled look on her face. "We're gonna be stuck here forever." Eddy moaned sadly.

Chihiro turned to Yubaba. "There must be some mistake none of these pigs are my parents." Yubaba eyed her.

"Are you sure? None of them is that really you're answer?" she asked in an incredulous tone.

Chihiro nodded. And just like that her contract exploded in Yubaba's hand. The spell was broken and all the pigs were reverted to their normal selves, which were all employees to the bathhouse. "You got it!" they all cheered at once. The bathhouse was electrified with cheers and laughter, congratulating Chihiro. Edd, unable to contain himself jumped in the air, cheering happily. Eddy got to the ground and starting thanking Jesus, Allah, Buddha, and the Tooth Fairy (don't asked why he prayed to her).

"Thank you everyone." Chihiro smiled.

"Alright, you win; now get out of my sight!" Yubaba huffed. She pointed to Eddy who was next to her. "That includes you and that dumb-hey where is he?"  
"Over here Granny Yuba!" Ed called from across the bridge, appearing as if from nowhere right next to Edd, who jumped with a start.

"Thank you Granny." Chihiro said and Yubaba snorted. Chihiro bowed one last time and ran off waving good bye to everyone, who all called back, wishing her well.

"Ed? Why are you holding onto that?" Edd asked, as he saw Ed trundle up next to him carrying a long piece of engraved wood, longer than him.

"Souvenir." He said smiling.

"And where exactly did you get that?" Haku asked him. He got his answer soon enough. The cracking grew louder. The cheers slowly died. As one they all turned and saw that the top floor of the bathhouse was cracking in various places. The largest split down the middle, slowly reaching the top. When it did, the entire top floor began to slide. Slowly at first, but it built speed as it sloped, crumbled, and rolled off the bathhouse, carrying almost all of Yubaba's wealth with it. The ruin crashed into the water, directly on top of the train tracks. Unfortunately a train was coming by, and it barreled right through, sending chunks of rock, and riches flying high into the air. Yubaba screamed as the employees scrambled over each other in attempt to catch the falling jewels, gold, and so on. Chihiro turned to Ed. As well as Eddy, Edd, and Haku. Ed looked back at them. "Uh you think this was important?" Ed said, pointing to his pole of engraved wood.

"Now would be a good time to go." Eddy said, and grabbing Chihiro by the hand, ran off, followed closely by the Eds.

"Where are my parents?" Chihiro asked.

"When the contract broke, they woke up on the human side of the river. They're there now, and looking for you.

They reached what they all remembered to be filled with water. But now, there was none. "I can't go any further than here." Haku said. "Just go back the way you came, you should be fine. Just go and don't look back."

"You don't need to tell me twice." Eddy said and he ran across the plain.

"And on that farm he had some grass. Ee Ay Ee Ay Oh!" Ed chimed and followed Eddy, still holding his giant piece of wood.

"But what about you Kohaku?" Chihiro asked.

"Don't worry; I'm going to go have a little 'talk' with Yubaba about my contract. I'm going to quit being her apprentice." He turned to face Chihiro. "I'll be fine now that I have my name back."

"We'll we see each other again?"

"Yes of course we will."

"Promise?"

"I promise. Now go." Kohaku let go of her hand and began to head back to the bathhouse.

"Come one Chihiro." Edd said holding out his hand. Chihiro looked at Edd. "We got a ways to go to catch up with those two."

Chihiro nodded and grasped his hand firmly. As promised, neither looked beck the entire time.

"Chihiro!" Mr. Ogino called. "Where are you?"

Chihiro looked over the next hill and saw her parents there. Along with Eddy and Ed, looking dazed and confused.

"You shouldn't run off like that. You could get into a lot of trouble." Chihiro's mother said as they got close enough.

"Right. Where'd we wander off to?" Eddy asked rubbing his head as they all walked back through the tunnel. He looked at Ed. "Where'd you get that stick?"

Ed looked it up and down. "I can't remember Eddy, and I would normally remember where I get something this big."

Edd looked at Ed and Eddy. "You…don't remember anything? Nothing at all?"

"Remember what?" eddy asked as they reached the end of the tunnel.

"What happened to the car?!" Mr. Ogino exclaimed, looking at the car that was covered in leaves and fallen stalks. "We were only gone for a few minutes. Uh Ed, leave that here, there's not enough room to take that."

Ed looked at the stick. "When did that get there?" he asked and placed the stick nest to a stone statue of a figure with its mouth open in something like shock or annoyance. Chihiro took one look back, before getting into the car. Mr. Ogino, started it up and called out. "Come on Chihiro, let's get going to our new home. You're not scared are you?"

"Don't worry honey. Everything will be alright." Mrs. Ogino called.

"Come on." Edd said. Chihiro looked back for one more second before rushing back to the car. As Mr. Ogino drove away, the kids all looked back from the back seat.

Eddy said. "Why do I get the feeling I just left a fortune behind there?"

Ed simply waved and said "Bye bye granny Yubaba!"

"What's a Yubaba?"

"What's a who now?"

Mr. Ogino chuckled to himself. "A new school and home, I bet it must be scary huh?"

Chihiro turned back and replied. "I think I can handle it."

The statue still stood there, watching them leave. But it was different, Edd noticed. It looked like it was smiling now.

The ED


End file.
